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You
Wrote, John Replied:
Selections from John's E-Mail:
(e-mail messages
may be posted or used on-air)
You
Wrote:
From: faithden
Sent: Friday, February 24, 2006 4:00 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: fred
John:
I love you
all the time, except ............when you trash your poor puppy
Fred. I Hate You right now.
I'll get over it
Faith
Janesville, WI
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, February 24, 2006 6:03 PM
To: 'faithden@charter.net'
Subject: RE: WEBMAIL: fred
I hope you do! Especially since when it comes to Fred, my bark
is bigger than my bite, if you will. When I come home every
night, I ALWAYS greet Fred first and it is such a warm and happy
dance we do that more often than not we both wet the the floor.
John Williams
You
Wrote:
From: CHJEEP
Sent: Wednesday, November 02, 2005 3:56 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Bird Flu
John,
I heard that the Bush administration has copies of documents
showing that a flock of chickens in the former Soviet Union
have bought aluminum tubes that can used only to make bird flu.
Clyde, Elmhurst
You
Wrote:
From: donald
Sent: Tuesday, June 21, 2005 9:40 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: Keyboard in the dishwasher
Dear Mr. Williams;
I heard the suffestion on your program for washinf the keyboard
of a PC in the dishwasher. Well, I tried it, and aside from
a gew of the keys gallinf ogg, my keyboard works freat now$
Sincerely,
donald
You
Wrote:
From:
Gloria
Sent: Wednesday, June 22, 2005 4:18 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: John...your two big whoppers at 4:15!
It's not
William Finch in "Broadcast News", it's PETER FINCH
in "NETWORK"!
Love you, ya goofy guy!
Gloria Montgomery
Burr Ridge
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, June 22, 2005 5:47 PM
To: 'Gloria'
Subject: RE: John...your two big whoppers at 4:15!
Still, I was pretty close.
Thanks for watching, John Williams
You
Wrote:
From: Kem
Sent: Wednesday, February 02, 2005 3:27 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."
...not, "Me and..................
Jeez
Louise! You drive me up a freakin' wall with that. You know
better.
John
replied...
To: Kem
Subject: RE: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."
I
KNOW I know better.
But I CAN'T stop.
jw
You
Wrote:
Sent:
Thursday, February 03, 2005 3:56 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: RE: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
You
Wrote:
From:
npsheb
Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2005 5:54 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: CBS
Before we
fire everyone at CBS for not getting all the facts right, maybe
we revisit the "golf ball and the hurricane" report.
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2005
To: npsheb
Agreed.
Matt should be fired.
You
Wrote:
From: Mandy
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 4:32 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Why does producer Matt always sound like he is on a phone? Is
he sitting
at home on his couch listening to the show and just calls in from
time
to time with his two cents? If so, how do I get his job?
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 6:07 PM
To: 'mandy'
Subject: RE:
He's on
the phone, though he is here, on the other side of the glass,
because it makes his voice seem inferior to mine and this way
I keep the rabble down.
Resumes
accepted.
JW
You
Wrote:
From: novak
Sent: Tuesday, November 30, 2004 7:11 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: memento film
The special
edition of the Memento DVD has a hidden feature that allows
you to see the film in chronological order. The DVD interface
on the second disk takes you through a multiple choice survey;
select 'c' as the answer to all the questions presented to you.
After about five questions, you should be shown four small pictures
involving a woman who is changing a flat tire. You are asked
to arrange the pictures in correct order by using the arrow
keys on your remote changer. If you arrange the pictures in
REVERSE order, the film, including the color and black and white
scenes, should play in correct chronological order. The film
will start by playing the credits backwards and then the film
will play in normal form. I cannot remember if after rearranging
the flat tire pictures you have to actively leave that element
of the DVD to have the film play, or if the film automatically
plays for you once you are done moving the pictures. I hope
this has not been too tedious an expl! anation, I heard you
the other day on your show saying you wished there was a way
to view the film in order and I thought you might be interested
in this hidden feature. Many DVDs come with hidden features,
some like this one are very interesting and add to the enjoyment
of the film. Thanks for taking the time to read this, have an
enjoyable holiday season.
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, December 01, 2004 10:27 AM
To: 'novak'
Subject: RE: WEBMAIL: memento film
Ha! I knew it! Wait, I didn't know it. But I wondered. Thanks
for the help. I"ll pass this along. John Williams
You
Wrote:
From: Purdue1014
Sent: Tuesday, November 16, 2004 4:13 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: ?
Dear King,
I love your show ect,ect (normal stuff)
I hate to bring back possible bad wounds, but I couln't listen
to your show the day after you went to the LaGrange Park YMCA
and tried to pull a Johnny Depp canoe stunt, and what was the
result?
Thanks King F,
Loyal Listener from Western Springs
ps What ever happened to Matts pen straping rocket to Mars?
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, November 26, 2004 4:32 PM
To: 'Purdue1014@aol.com'
Cc: Bubala, Matt
Subject: RE: ?
We couldn't get that thing to sink enough to walk on the bottom.
We tried everything! It was....funny and exhausting. I took
photos to post on our site. I can't find them.
MAtt's mini-NASA project is stalled in the windmills of his
mind.
JW
You
Wrote:
From: Joseph G. Hurley
Sent: Thursday, November 04, 2004 8:37 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Election Rumors
Your Majesty,
Is there
any truth to the rumor that after John Kerry voted for himself,
he flip flopped and voted for Bush??
Have a nice
day!
Joseph
G. Hurley
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, November 04, 2004 10:29 AM
To: 'Joseph G. Hurley'
Subject: RE: Election Rumors
Two words:
Fun Nee. Thanks for the smile. JW
You
Wrote:
From: Peter Goss Jr.
Sent: Tuesday, October 19, 2004 8:10 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Good day John...
I am a huge Cubs fan and a big fan of your show. I also support
your campaign for King and hope you get there one day as you
have many fine ideas. That being said...I'm a bit confused.
I've been listening the past couple weeks and heard that you
were going to vote for Kerry. Everyone is entitled to their
own vote, but looking at history, your choice confuses me. Over
a year ago, President Bush invaded Iraq due to the intelligence
three governments (including our own, England and Russia) supplied
him that said Saddam had WMDs. Now, we've been told for the
past twelve years by three administrations and every nation
in the UN that he had something. Why else would they have continued
to pass the resolutions that they did in the UN. We now know
that the big four countries that didn't want to go to war with
us were benefiting financially with Saddam in power. Hmmm...why
wouldn't they join us in attacking if they said he had the weapons?
Could it be because they were doing illegal activity with him.
However, that (as I'm sure you agree) should have no emphasis
on why the President went after Saddam. After 9/11 (the favorite
slogan for all Bush officials), the world changed. I don't understand
the thinking in one's head that after that day in September,
if the entire world says he has WMDs, why you would want to
let him do anything with them. True, now we know he didn't have
them. But, is that really a chance any one of us would have
wanted to take? Kerry even has said that he was a threat to
our security and needed to take him out. He looked at the same
intelligence Bush did. Heck he's on the intelligence committee.
So, Iraq is the one thing that won't get Bush your vote eh?
Something just doesn't add up. It frightens me...Kerry winning.
The same man that said we needed to get UN approval before we
commit troops to anything is the same person that voted not
to help Kuwait 12 plus years ago when the UN asked us to go
get him. This is really a man you want, your kids to be going
to school with, in office? Please, please, please explain.
Peter
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, October 19, 2004 12:47 PM
To: 'Peter Goss Jr'
Subject: RE: Good day John...
Thanks for listening and writing, and as a fellow Cubs fan,
agonizing. I can't explain it much further than that. You make
an interesting point here - the whole world was wrong and it
is a gamble we couldn't afford to have taken - but I see the
stream of events differently. My view is that we're the nation
that lead the attack and history shows we acted with unnecessary
force. What scares me more than a Kerry presidency is another
generation of terrorists we've created here.
Here's the funny thing. If Bush wins, I'm not going to complain
from the sidelines. This country is divided on this thing, but
the process is better than any one of the candidates. So if
it is Bush, I'll tell myself and our radio audience that 50+%
of the people can't be THAT wrong. So let's move forward and
make the best of this thing.
That, or me being King.
I wish all my incoming email were as reasoned as yours. Sincerely,
John Williams
You
Wrote:
From: Jkstay
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2004 3:47 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Mesopotamia
John, where were you when you took World History in high school
- remember the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers in the "Cradle
of Civilization"? That's where our nation is at war!!!!!!
Please apologize to your World History teacher!!!!!
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2004 6:55 PM
To: 'Jkstay'
Subject: RE: Mesopotamia
Okay, I will. But I don't remember his name. Or her name. I forget.
JW
You
Wrote:
From:
Laverne
Sent: Thursday, September 09, 2004 6:43 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: A little musing
John,
today I was just musing a bit - I ride an hour home each evening
from a Grand Rapids job to Holland. The thought was running through
my head that we might have learned some quite clear lessons from
the 9/11 thing, which I hadn't heard anyone talking about.
One (or two) of the terrorists' picks was New York. I know that
is a huge American Capitalist financial center and all, and represents
our monitary and things successes, but it is also is a very well
known stronghold of some of our outspokenest and recognized ultra
liberal and Democrat population. The plans for this triumph against
"us", some of us, were laid out and set up during 8
years of our most ultra liberal and Democrat dominated national
governing trio, Hillary, Bill, and Al (since LBJ). Why might that
have inspired this ? - - - - So, now if we put up Kerry-Edwards
, probably the most liberal, left, Democrat current folks, even
if you measure by voting records, why would these radical, fundamentalist,
ultra conservative, terrorists go away or stop their effort which
began as it did ? They hate liberal, gay, bare it all, Hollywood
ideoligies. No ? How can anyone, believe that electing Kerry would
reduce the threat ? Seems based on history, it'd increase it,
just naturally. And on top of that, wouldn't it be wise to recognize
that Chicago isn't in this regard, any different from New York
? I'm sure Daly has thought of this, but I've not heard any mention
of it. Maybe you better just protect your ass by not voting for
Kerry/Edwards. Oh OH Oh, I said it.
Your thoughts ?
Vern
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, September 10, 2004 12:43 PM
To: 'Laverne'
Subject: RE: A little musing
Thanks
for the note, Vern. If the ideology of the president has a lot
to do with terrorist activities, then I don't see why they chose
to attack us when a republican was in office. My plan to protect
my ass is to do whatever I think will keep terrorists from attacking
us. I think that you can't win a war or terrorism per se, any
more than you can win the wars on poverty or disease. They're
all just unfortunate parts of the human condition. But I do think
you confine these things. I think you can stop them from spreading.
And I believe that antagonizing these people - which something
like the war in Iraq does - is an invitation to spread hatred
of America. We can win any traditional war and we should strike
back at anyone who strikes us first. We should even take steps
to safeguarding ourselves from future attacks. But personally,
I don't feel safer now that we've preemptively invaded Iraq. For
that reason alone I can't imagine voting for Bush.
You
Wrote:
From: M.M.Freeman
Sent: Tuesday, September 07, 2004 8:19 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: JUST THE FACTS
John,
it's always been apparent to me that you are a liberal and perhaps
leaning toward ultra liberal, but today I saw (heard) you in a
new light.
You stated that you didn't think that Michael Moore's film was
very
accurate or something to that effect. Wow, John, I ordinarily
would have expected
you to believe Moore's garbage totally and completely. Hooray
for you, maybe
your mind has some openess. I'm not a fan of President Bush, and
Mr.
Kerry is no better, but I do believe that the President has been
honest if not
misled in some instances. And while I'm an independent, I tend
to lean
to the right on many issues. I'm now going to try and have an
open mind
listening to you just as you seem to have had an open mind about
Michael
Moore's trash. Maybe you would be a good King! (:-)
Murray
John
replied...
From:
Williams, John (WGN)
To: 'M.M.Freeman'
Sent: 9/8/04 11:14 AM
Subject: RE: JUST THE FACTS
I
think I am now a Republicat. Conservative fiscally - taxes, spending,
etc - but to the left on social issues: abortion, gay rights,
guns, the
Cubs, etc. But none of that blinds me from the obvious: Moore
isn't a
documentarian as much as an editorialist. And Bush isn't evil,
he's
dumb. And I would be a good King, but lately I'm not sure who
would
want to be in the Kingdom. Either way, thanks for listening and
writing. John Williams
You
Wrote...
From: Gail Poisson
Sent: Thursday, August 26, 2004 5:12 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Your Kingship Competition
John,
Your campaign for kingship is in trouble. I saw a bumper sticker
today that read " Elect Jesus as king." That is pretty
strong competition.
Gail
John
replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, August 26, 2004 5:33 PM
To: 'Gail'
Subject: RE: Your Kingship Competition
I'm so toast.
In fact, even if He was toast, He could divide it into ulimited
toasts.
Thanks for the heads up.
JW
You Wrote . . .
From: Randy Stukenberg
Sent: Friday, March 12, 2004 5:45 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: John, you WILL drown...something you haven't thought
about
John-
Yes, it will work, but...as you breathe in, you will suck the
air in the milk jug into your lungs. Water will replace this air,
and before you get a half a breath, you will be breathing in the
water that replaced the air. Even with a larger bucket, you may
get a couple of breathes, but as you breathe out, you will fill
the air with carbon dioxide that you are breathing out and you
will asphixiate. A canoe would work because you have a large volume
of air, if you could get it to the bottom of the pool.
Good Luck!
Randy
Byron, IL
John
Replied....
Memo
to self....thanks for the note. JW
You Wrote . . .
Sent: Thursday,
February 12, 2004 3:54 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Balance?
JW:
Since
you've had so much fun bashing Bush the last few weeks, it will
be interesting to see if you will similarly be harsh on Kerry
for his intern bimbo eruption.
Frank Oelerich
John
Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, February 12, 2004 3:59 PM
Subject: RE: Balance?
I think we've started. I wonder if the intern in question has
receipts proving he was with her? JW
You Wrote . . .
From: Patrick
Sent: Wednesday, April 30, 2003 2:42 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: who cares
John;
Who the hell cares about the college coach from Iowa? Certainly
not "GN listeners .....give it up for Christ sake.
--- Patrick
John
Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, April 30, 2003 4:04 PM
Subject: RE: who cares
It was Iowa State, but I don't think that changes your point,
right? Just wondering. JW
You Wrote . . .
From: Adam
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 3:33 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: The echo in the phone
That
you get when you talk to people in Texas is due to the large empty
space in their heads.
I left Chicago to move to Houston 2 years ago, and I have fled
like a refugee this year. It is the most awful place in the USA
to live and I am aware of places such as Gary Indiana and Detroit
Michigan.
John
Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 4:46 PM
To: 'Adam'
Subject: RE: The echo in the phone
I
see. Sooooo....you don't like Texas, right? JW
You Wrote . . .
From: Adam
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 4:36 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: RE: The echo in the phone
You
might say that. And here is the list of reasons why:
1)
Road construction that never ends. One of my relatives decided
Texas only has equipment to tear things up and no equipment to
put things back together.
2) Mosquitoes
in January…Nothing more needs to be said.
3) Mildew.
I think it is the state flower.
4) Lowest
air quality in the nation.
5) Enron
6) Flooding.
Who builds a Medical Center in a flood plain?
7) Did
you know Texas is full of Texans? Why we ever fought Mexico for
the Country of Texas I can’t understand.
When
I left, as soon as the car tires crossed the state line and I
was back on American soil, I pulled over and burned every map
of Texas I had…It was very therapeutic.
You Wrote . . .
Sent: Wednesday, February 05, 2003 2:13 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject:
Well
John when are you leaving...LeBron James was cleared and yesterday
you said if he was you were gone....
Linda Hauser
John
Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, February 05, 2003 2:21 PM
To: 'Linda Hauser'
Subject: RE:
OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH CANNNNNADAAAAAAAAAAA! JW
You Wrote . . .
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: The answers to your 10 questions...
The
6th question about Wrigley Field is just NOT what every Chicagoan
should know, I've lived here my whole life and knew all the other
answers but I am a White Sox fan, of course you working for the
Cubs and Tribune would never know that there was another baseball
team in this town, but Sox fans or if your not a baseball fan
would not know that! But that's not important! TO ANYONE! Were
you even born here? I doubt it, like all of WGN that claims to
be all Chicago, most of your announcers are from small little
towns like Spike from Iowa and boy can you tell! Also your 3rd
question about tallest buildings, well John Hancock is 100 stories
high, not including attennas, and Aon is only like 80 or 85 at
the most, so get your facts straight then maybe, just maybe you
too can pretend to be a real Chicagoan! Gheez
John
Replied....
From:
Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, February 04, 2003 12:46 PM
Subject: RE: The answers to your 10 questions...
Tmac! I was born here and the Aon building is like about 9 feet
taller than the Hancock! We're not counting the antennae because
that isn't the "building!" The number of stories has
nothing to do with the height! We did look it up! Geez! What is
it with you Sox fans! I think you may have a point about #6, however!
I'm considering dumping it! Gheez whiz! JW!
You Wrote . . .
Sent: Wednesday,
January 22, 2003 11:34 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: You really must love yourself
John,
I've listen to WGN for the past 50 years and you are the first
WGN personality, I have turned off. You totally went over the
line when you belittled, berated and castigated Annie and the
rest of the staff who enjoyed the movie "CHICAGO."
Well, it look like the foreign press and the general public at
large disagree with you!
Once again you have allowed your Alligator mouth override your
Humming bird ass, You can be sure, I will no longer be listening
to WGN on the go home.
Your over bearing Ego has cost WGN another listener.
You really get under my skin when you have a listener who you
disagree with. You are very rude to say the least.
Hopefully you will be replaced in the near future.
Donald
Antioch, IL.
John
Replied....
Sent: Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:01 AM
Subject: RE: You really must love yourself
Dear Donald, Oh well, thank you for giving my show a try. I can't
say you didn't try to listen. I hope you will nonetheless listen
to Spike and the rest of the gang. And I'll tell Annie and Dave
you said Hi.
Hummingbird ass. I like that. JW
You Wrote . . .
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Sent: Tuesday, January 21, 2003 6:37 PM
Subject: whaaa???
how
did you decide that "twice as cold" was equal to half
way between 0 and absolute 0?
for
all we know, a difference of 20 degrees could be twice as cold.
or 50 degrees. the scale could change as it got colder (e.g. 80
degrees could be twice as hot as 70, but 100 could be twice as
hot as 80.)
in
other words, it could be exponential increases or decreases. just
like seizemographs (sp?): 6 on the richter scale is 10 times worse
than 5, so 5.1 would be twice as bad as 5.
try
to decide how much hungrier you would be if you were twice as
hungry as you are now. you'd probably be able to eat twice as
much? if you are twice as cold, maybe the measure would be twice
as many blankets to keep you as warm as you would be if it were
zero? i'm sure you'd need a lot fewer blankets for that than you'd
need if it were halfway to absolute zero.
yes,
i vote for the blanket answer. twice as cold as zero is the temparature
at which you'd need twice as many blankets to keep warm.
~chris
John
Replied....
You
are MUCH better at this than me.
We
said twice as cold as zero (F) would be - 229 since that was half-way
to absolute zero (F). (A NASA website was our source.) When anyone
asks, in the future, I'm going to refer them - and NASA - to you.
Thanks
for lsitening, JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Your Show
Date: 1/18/00 9:04 AM
John I love your show
.
Thought you might enjoy
this if you havent already seen it .
Keeping Great Company
-- Can you imagine working at the following Company?
It has a little over
500 employees with the following statistics:
- 29 have been accused of spousal
abuse
- 7 have been arrested for fraud
- 19 have been accused of writing
bad checks
- 117 have bankrupted at least
two businesses
- 3 have been arrested for assault
- 71 cannot get a credit card
due to bad credit
- 14 have been arrested on drug-related
charges
- 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
- 21 are current defendants in
lawsuits
- In 1998 alone, 84 were stopped
for drunk driving
Can you guess which
organization this is? See below...
It's the 535 members
of your United States Congress. The same group that perpetually
cranks out hundreds upon hundreds of new laws designed to keep
the rest of us in line.
John Replied . .
.
It's
a great story, isn't it? Paul Harvey even reported it on his nationally
syndicated radio show. We looked in to it, too, and discovered
- or are certain enough - that it isn't true. The story is impossible
to verify and no one is taking credit? Some parts of it might
be true and the point it makes, or is trying to make, is a good
one. But the figures are fiction. Darn!
Thanks
for listening,
John
Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: (no subject)
Date: 1/14/00 2:31 PM
Hi John,
A bit of constructive
criticism... you really over due the use of the word "opulent"
everytime you mention the studio. The word is being overworked,
in fact I rather doubt that it is the appropriate word for defining
your studio. If you are using it as a joke... it is getting old.
If you actually like the looks of the studio, be creative and
use some other words to discribe it. You do have an interesting
show with some great guests. Keep up the good work.
John Replied . .
.
The
funny thing is, they really are opulent. And yes, I do like using
the word. Always have. Can't explain it. I know it is annoying
to some of you and I'm trying to be more judicious.
Yackety
Smackety.
John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject:
Y10K
Date: 1/13/00 7:22 PM
Do
you think the computer geeks had the foresight to add a third
digit to the date field, or are we going to have to go through
this whole thing again in 8000 years? Love your show.
John Replied . .
.
Three
words. OH MY GOD! Thanks for listening. Okay, that's six. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Latest Photo
Date: 1/11/00 11:29 PM
John,
you have more nerve
than sense. Quite a spectacle. By the way, did anyone (or everyone)
ever mention you sound so much like Alan Alda? I only get to hear
you to or from work and have been waiting for someone to make
that remark. All at WGN keep up the great shows.
Bonna
John Replied . .
.
Actually,
I hear that all the time. About Alda. Now that you mention it,
the sense part rings a bell, too. Thanks for listening, John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: a constructive
criticism
Date: 1/11/00 10:08 PM
John,
This has been bugging
me for a long time, and I thought I'd go ahead and get it off
my chest. You have a habit of doing something that really annoys
me. Let's call it cliffhanger syndrome. You start discussing a
subject, really get into it, then all of a sudden you stop and
say you'll get to the rest of it sometime later in the week.
You used to do it constantly.
Then, either you settled down, or I stopped catching it as much
(due to my listening pattern no doubt,which I'll discuss in a
moment). Yesterday, you did it again. You were discussing some
of the best scenes from movies, and how one was out of place compared
to the rest (the final scenes in Casablanca, and Citizen Kane
are the ones I remember). But instead of telling us about the
incongruous scene, or opening the lines up for guesses, you went
the cliffhanger route again.
In my line of work,
I am in and out of my truck dozens upon dozens of times everyday.
I can't stay tuned in every minute of every day to here "the rest
of the story", to steal a phrase from Paul Harvey. I'm sure there
are many other listeners who are in the same situation.
I would guess that you
have a large number of listeners who start their morning with
WGN, and listen throughout the rest of the day. Therefore, you
don't need to bribe them by using teasers, and getting to the
good parts sometimes days later.
In the future, could
you please try to remember that there are a lot of us who listen
whenever we can....but can't listen whenever we want.
There. I feel better
now.
John Replied . .
.
Sometimes
I (we) string you all along on purpose, hoping you'll listen longer.
Other times, there really isn't more time and we finish the story
after the news or the next day. (Sometimes it's an ongoing story,
like the summarizing I've been doing of The Bob Love Story.) So
I'm sorry if you can't hear the conclusions all the time, but
I'm afraid it's part of the show.
However,
sometimes - and yesterday was a good example - I could have solved
the dilemma, didn't and should be called on it. I said that last
year there were four movie scenes the Academy said were the greatest
of the century. The final scene of Casablanca, Citizen Kane, Sunset
Boulevard and one other that was hardly in the class of these
three. What was the scene, I asked, promising to answer it later
this week." Shame on me.
Thanks
for listening.
John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: streaking pic
Date: 1/11/00 9:45 PM
Are you smoking a cigarette?
John Replied . .
.
Nope.
Never have, never will. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Streaking
Date: 1/11/00 6:39 PM
Hey John,
I couldn't wait to see
the picture of you streaking and when Steve and Johnnie were conversing
about it, I jumped out of bed and made 5 copies. Now being a few
weeks short of 70 years of age, jumping out of bed in the middle
of the night is a bit of a stretch. Keep up the good work and
you will never grow old. (hopefully in years but never in mind).
Thanks for the jolt . My pacemaker needed it.
Grandma Joan
John Replied . .
.
Here
to serve... Thanks for listening. And jumping...JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: photos
Date: 1/11/00 5:54 PM
I left Ill. last week
and since I'm now in Fla enjoying the beautiful weather the only
blip in my world was being homesick for WGN. Of course once I
looked at the photos on the website I decided not to be homesick
any more. J.P.
John Replied . .
.
Now
you know why they call it IL. Thanks for listening. Enjoy the
weather. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: organization
Date: 1/11/00 4:18 PM
You are supposed to
be the organized one (certainly not Bob or Spike). How come Milt
can tell us what is going to be on Extension 720 for the rest
of the month and you only have one listing.
John Replied . .
.
'Cause
Milt books a month ahead. I book tomorrow's show today. Sometimes,
tomorrow. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject:
(no subject)
Date: 1/10/00 9:35 PM
I
can't believe you did that! Wish I would have been there! I couldn't
have done better myself.....well, maybe I could have, but not
when you did it! Best of luck - like I said, wish I could have
been there for the EVENT!
John Replied . .
.
Thanks,
Kathleen. Next year, it may go public. (With an L) I hope you
join us then, if infact it happens and if infact I still, you
know, have a job here. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Do you it!
Date: 1/10/00 9:09 PM
President Clinton is
really good stuff! Do you do his voice? Hope someday I can get
a CD of all the conversations. Bob is good, Spike is good but
your the best thing that ever happened to WGN! Been a listener
of WGN for years but your show is the best! This is not your Mom!
Wayne
John Replied . .
.
But
wait! My mother's name IS Wayne! Coincidence....? JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: What a bod
Date: 1/10/00 9:03 PM
John,
after looking at your
picture it appears you have the perfect outfit for Bourbon Street,
New Orleans. What I mean is as we approach Mardi Gras you would
fit right in and no one would make a fuss. In fact john you would
probably have more clothing on than most of the revelers at Mardi
Gras. What a beautiful thing. Do your children have a copy to
hold over you as you refuse to meet their demands?
John Replied . .
.
Rhonda,
Thanks for writing and for caring. My children are now in a pediatric
counseling center for the children of the criminally insane and/or
talk show hosts. All the best, JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: I give up!
Date: 1/10/00 8:14 PM
Hey John,
After much thought,
I still can't pin down your NYE costume! I've seen dead fish with
more color.!!?? Perhaps a living sculpture...in pizza dough? Poster
boy for Jama Magazine? I have done crazy things..but...man...that
took took sand! Your poor wife! RJH
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Get some on
Date: 1/9/00 5:50 PM
Are you going to this
every year??????? put some meat on those bones, you look like
your starving!!
John Replied . .
.
Thanks
for listening...I've thought about doing this again, next year.
But I probably shouldn't. Really. JW
You Wrote . . .
Date: 1/9/00 4:14 PM
john, john, john can the gay pride parade be too far behind?
John Replied . .
.
I will not be marching
in the gay pride parade. Who would follow?
You Wrote . . .
Subject:
the picture
Date: 1/9/00 12:38 AM
hi
John,
I
just want to say I give you a lot of credit for the jog around
the block. It sure was a different way to start off the 21st century.
I would not have the nerve to do something like that. I hope you
have a very happy 2000. Cheri
John Replied . .
.
Merci,
Cheri.
You Wrote . . .
Date:
1/8/00 11:34 PM
Hi
John,
Why
can't I find your New Years Eve picture--the one all the world
is talking about? All my friends without computers have given
the word that I have to make copies so they can see you. HELP!!!!!!!
A
WGN Fan, (Spike knows me aka "Bone Marrow Butt, Jean")
John Replied . .
.
Wiser
people than me should be responding to you from WGN Radio on how
to access the photo. Wiser people than me should have stopped
me that night, too. My best to the neighborhood. JW
ed.:
The infamous Millenium
Streak photo (NOT FOR SENSITIVE EYES)
You Wrote . . .
Subject: New Years Eve
antics
Date: 1/7/00 9:37 PM
Hey John,
I love your New Years
picture. On New Years Eve 10 years ago, my husband (my ex now)
and I were playing the quarters game with a bunch of friends and
the loser was supposed to put on a ladies sexy nightie and run
around the neighborhood. Of course the guys were hoping one of
the ladies would lose, but it was my husband who lost. He proceeded
to put on this very sexy, very skimpy, nightie, complete with
fish net stockings and garter belt. All this he wore with his
work boots. Carrying a fake Christmas tree, he ran around the
neighborhood. It really was a sight when he came back around by
our house and there were 2 dogs barking and running along with
him! New Years is a time to have fun and I'm glad to see you had
a lot of it yourself! Happy 2000, John, to you and your family.
Gayle
John Replied . .
.
My
run looks tame, now. Happy New Year. JW
Your Wrote . . .
Date: 1/7/00 9:26 PM
Hi John!
I'm one of your fans
until I saw that streaking thing on the web. So what have you
got stored in that underwear you're wearing? And-------are you
"smoking" a cigarette? I can't
picture you a smoker but then again you do have zillions of weird
ideas.
Please don't disgrace
yourself like this - for the sake of WGN radio. I thought you
had more class!
How does Brenda put
up with you?
John Replied . .
.
I
can't answer the last question. The flashlight is in my underware.
In my mouth is one of those paper horns you blow at midnight.
Happy new year, JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: The Streak
Date: 1/7/00 9:08 PM
I hope nobody confuses
you with Cal Ripken, Jr.
John Replied . .
.
Happens
all the time. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: New photo
Date: 1/7/00 8:04 PM
John,
Nice pic!!!! I have
to assume that you were feeling NO pain. Do try to keep in mind
that this station is a "family radio station". LOL
John Replied . .
.
Here's
the scary part. In the picture, I'm sober. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: photo
Date: 1/7/00 7:53 PM
awesome. Should be attire
for political speaches, or mascot for a new political party. The
one with nothing to hide. (wouldn't be appropriate for our Governor).
Bud
Urbana, IL
John Replied . .
.
Good
line, Bud. If I run, you're my PR guy. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Photo
Date: 1/7/00 5:04 PM
Too cute for me. Keep
up the good work, love your show.
Renée
P.S. Love the clean
shaven......face.
John Replied . .
.
I'm
reassured. I stand there 92% nude and your reaction is, "Where's
the goatee." Thanks for the kind words and for listening, John
Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: That picture
Date: 1/7/00 4:19 PM
I have decided not to
watch your radio station any more. Disgusting!
John Replied . .
.
There's
an expression "face made for radio." The term may need amending.
Thanks
for listening, anyway...JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Thank You
Date: 1/7/00 4:08 PM
Bravo! You are truly
the best. Not sure if it was by choice but glad to see you have
the courage to be displayed "au" natural! You are often the reason
for people staring at me driving down the road wondering why I
am laughing out loud! Wish I could listen more often - guess that
is why I LOVE Saturdays! I could listen to you all day but I do
love Spike and the Sports Central boys! Keep up the incredible
work John - And since I work for the Cancer Society - I am glad
you don't visit the Tanning Beds!!
Sincerely
Shari
John Replied . .
.
Thanks,
Shari. Several had said I SHOULD have tanned first. Or lifted
weights. Or left town....I hope you stay tuned to WGN, JohnWilliams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: New Year's
Picture
Date: 1/7/00 2:18 PM
Some people have to
LIGHTEN UP!!! I think what you did took guts. I don't know why
you did it but I'm sure it was just for FUN!!! I love to laugh
and feel sorry for those people who can't. Keep up the good work
on your show. I enjoy listening to you. Sheila
John Replied . .
.
I
guess the fact that I was returning home from church when the
photo was snapped turned some people off...Thanks for listening.
JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Your Midnight
Run
Date: 1/4/00 11:49 PM
Dear John,
I listen to your show
quite often and have enjoyed most of your programs, but I nearly
had an accident when I heard you talking about your run around
the block. It was so funny!! It reminded me of some of the crazy
things my Dad would do. I will always remember how funny my father
could be, and I am sure your sons will remember how funny you
can be. Keep up the good work and I look forward to seeing the
pictures in the Photo Gallery.
Sincerely,
Art McPheron
John Replied . .
.
You
are kind. And hopefully farsighted. I'm waiting for the photos,
too. We'll announce it loudly when they get up there....JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: names of football
bowls
Date: 12/31/99 7:48 AM
How can you criticize
the use of corporate names for bowl games, when you no longer
say this is "WGN Radio" - you must add a "Tribune Station" or
similar. The Tribune is your sponsor, just like Nokia or Qualcom
or any other. Think!!! S. Tillman
John Replied . .
.
Maybe
so...The Tribune is our parent company, technically, and in fact
buys very little advertising here if any. But I see your point,
sort of.
Thanks
for listening and happy Nokia/Tuppperware New Year. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Ryan
Date: 12/30/99 6:37 AM
Ryan is governor of
the state and head of the Republican party.
Ryan cannot deliver
the Republican vote for the anti-crime bill.
All democrats voted
FOR the bill. And you stupidly ask, "Why are the newspapers saying
RYAN lost?"
Are you on the Republican
payroll like Bob Collins?
John Replied . .
.
yes.
Just kidding. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Not With My
Money You Don't
Date: 12/29/99 9:59 AM
John,
Of course, you don't
mind spending $3,000,000 to bring a lot of potential trouble-makers
into this country. You don't pay taxes in Chicago. You just earn
your money there and rush off to spend it in the suburbs where
you live.
Oh, by the way, who
cares what they think in Cameroon or some of those other God-forsaken
places? Let's keep America for Americans for a change. If you
think there are other places worthy of note, why don't you simply
pack up and move there? K
John Replied . .
.
K....I
don't know where to begin.... In closing, let me wish you a happy
new year. Sincerely, John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: I hope you
can help me.
Date: 12/29/99 8:34 PM
I was listening before
Christmas and I heard you mention a new game that you played with
your family. You said it was really fun. I think you said the
name of the game was "Set." It was card game and you said the
kids could play right along with the adults. Is this the right
name of the game? If so, where did you get it? I live in Muskegon
Michigan and I've looked around here for the game and can't find
it. I'd appreciate it if you could give me the name and where
to find it.
THANKS so much!!!!
John Replied . .
.
Blurt
is a game where you shout out the right answer; Tribond is one
where you guess the common bond between three subjects and Say
When is the game we play often where adults and kids guess approximate
answers to various questions...Thanks for listening. I hope this
helps. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Math lesson
Date: 12/28/99 10:56 PM
John, you sniveling
idiot (a.k.a. drooling fool), Williams:
I was devastated to
learn that you were as stupid as so many others who have bought
into the popular culture thing of calling 12/31/1999 as the end
or 01/01/2000 as the beginning of the 20th century or the second
millenium. As your "commander" weather guy (his name isn't on
the web site) said the other day, it's the millenium coming up
only for those who can't count. If you can read either MS Excel
or Lotus 1-2-3, you can see on the attachments how easy this Friday
is not the end of the century or the millenium. A decade is 10
years starting with 1. Of course a century starts with a year
ending in a "1" and ending in a zero. If you start counting pennies
and stop at 1,999 of them, will a bank give you a $20 bill when
you take them in? No, it won't, unless it is in a generous mood
and rounds it up for you. You simply don't have 2000 years without
2000 years - all of them. You don't start the third millenium
until you start counting with a 1 again. One of the few exceptions
to such counting is the temperature which does have a "0", but
it also has minus figures. Calendars don't have minuses and neither
do ages (even if you put the battery in the clock backwards).
Frankly, I am ashamed
to have one thing in common with you -- being a Saluki. It's not
too late to redeem yourself - buck the popular culture idiocy.
Stop propogating the lie -- the new century doesn't start 1/1/2000!!!!!!
You've heard the old adage: if you repeat a lie often enough to
enough people, it becomes the truth. To quote the great philosopher
and deep thinker, Charlie Brown: "Arrggghhh!" JC
John Replied . .
.
sorry.
John williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Tuesday morning
tip.
Date: 12/28/99 10:06 AM
Dear John-
(Jeez, when I was in
the army, we got a three day pass for letters which were considered
"Dear John" letters-which shows you what an old fart I am.)
Anyhow - I listened
a couple of years ago, and some guest said something about a company
caled Macromedia, which owns the patent for the digital tv broadcasting
equipment.
So, I bought a little
at about $16/per. Then last year, for xmas spending, I sold 2/3
for $45. It is now about $90!!! So, naturally when you discussed
Botex, I immediately went to my on-line broker and discovered
that there ain't no such symbol or company called Botex!! Sure,
I'd buy a hundred or so at $1.28! My computer geek son turned
me on to baanf as they were going to buy his company. I got it
for $35 or so. The deal didn't go through, and it is now about
$9! Oh he also told me about Sun Systems, so I got a little at
$75, and it hasn't moved. I will ask him about Botex.
See what you can start?
Well, you really knew that, didn't you?
O.F. across the lake
in St. Joe.
John Replied . .
.
congrats. sorry. etc.
The info I have, as you heard, is from Joel Stein in this week's
Time and his source is a porn star who has a friend who says he
owns this cool company that makes tires that never wear out. If
I can locate the stock symbol, I'm transferring my IRA and 401-K.
Let me know if you find it and invest. John Williams
Hey, I hear it is Botex
and the symbol is BTX or BTXIF. Always read and follow prospectus
carefully. Close cover before striking..JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Sports Names
Date: 12/29/99 9:38 AM
HI John!
Heard your discussion
this morning about sports names and even tho this is not a famous
sports figure it is a great name. When my mother was in high school
in the 1930's she went with the high school basketball star. His
name was CHAMP RUSHING! Isn't that a great name? She didn't marry
him but I have often thought how neat it would be to have a father
with this name! Enjoy your show very much. Happy 2000!!
- Mitcheltree
John Replied . .
.
Not that Mitcheltree
isn't fun to say, too. Eh?
Thanks for listening
and writing. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Computer Haiku
(humor)
Date: 12/28/99 9:11 AM
Hi John,
I was listening to you
this morning talking about the problems with your new computer
and the lack of any helpful message to describe the problem. Someone
sent this list of computer haiku to me, and I thought you might
enjoy reading it.
Here's an additional
haiku that I've written for you:
I cannot make toast
But since you've raised the question
Now you must reboot
Happy New Year!
Jody
In Japan, Sony Vaio
machines have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft
error messages with their own Japanese haiku poetry. Each only
17 syllables. Ingenious!
Windows NT crashed
I am the Blue Screen of Death
No one hears your screams
A file that big?
It might be very useful
But now it is gone
The Web site you seek
Cannot be located but
Countless more exist
Chaos reigns within
Reflect, repent, and reboot
Order shall return
ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have worked on
You ask way too much
Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that
First snow, then silence
This thousand dollar screen dies
So beautifully
With searching comes
loss
And the presence of absence
'My Novel' not found
The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner
Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down
A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone
Three things are certain
Death, taxes, and lost data
Guess which one occured
You step in the stream
But the water has moved on
This page is not here
Out of memory
We wish to hold the whole sky
But we never will
Having been erased
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped
Serious error
All shortcuts have disappeared
Screen. Mind. Both are blank
John Replied . .
.
You are lovely and talented.
Many thanks, John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Bill Clinton
Date: 12/26/99 2:43 PM
John,
I love your talks with
Pres. Clinton. Keep it up!
Deb from Madison, Wi.
John Replied . .
.
Thanks. Sincerely, John
Williams
...of the United States?
You Wrote . . .
Subject: hi ya
Date: 11/3/99 1:01 AM
Hey John,
I listen to you whenever
I am in my van, and that is pretty much all the time. I enjoy
your show, and I can't believe at the age of 33 I enjoy WGN. When
I was growing up as a kid, my Mom always had WGN on in the morning
and in her car. It used to drive me nuts. Keep up the great job.
Is that you doing Clinton's voice? I know that's a real dumb question.
Ha Ha Julie J
John Replied . .
.
Julie,
The first sign you're on your way to middle age is not only listening
to WGN Radio, but LIKING it! Thanks for tuning in. (I went through
the same thing as a kid; maybe our parents were so dumb afterall...)
Sincerely, John Williams...of the United States?
You Wrote . . .
Subject: A Little Help
From My Radio
Date: 10/30/99 12:31 PM
Dear Uncle Bobby, Kathy,Judy,
Spike and John,
I am in need of some
help from you, and the listeners of WGN. First let me tell you
why. I live on a small farm in the Northwest Suburbs and my Dad
and his parents (now deceased) moved here 50 years ago this September.
This is our last Christmas on the farm and my brothers and I are
looking to do something special for our parents. We have a 35'+
blue spruce and my Dad has always wanted to put lights in it for
the holidays. I am going to be writing letters to family and friends
to ask them to help pay for the cost of all the lights and the
labor of putting the lights on. Thats where I need your help.
I need to find a company
that has a "cherry-picker" and will also be able to put the lights
on the tree. Both of my brothers are out of state so this is more
like my little project and I would appreciate any help you can
give me. If it would not be a problem could you maybe ask the
listeners for help. This is a surprise so please don't mention
any names.
Many Thanks
John Replied . .
.
Carrie, this is no small
request. At least I don't have any idea how to help; but I will
solicit my audience and pass your e-mail address along if I get
a caller or two who is interested. Yours is a very thoughtful
idea. Good luck. John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Re: The Sixth Sense
Date: 9/10/99 5:19 PM
Funnie John - never
thought about that. Could it be that in reality this movie actually
is about his wife missing him, and she was dreaming the whole
thing.
John Replied . .
.
Bobby
Ewing already did that. I don't know; the movie is still great.
But that no one is addressing this point is puzzling to me. Thanks
again, JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject:
Traffic backups Author: mmostaccio@gr.com at Internet_TCO
Date: 9/10/99 1:15 PM
Hi
John,
You
were talking about why the traffic backs up and then opens up,
and I have a theory about at least one of our roads. On the I-90
east bound, driving in from Schaumburg, I am convinced that traffic
comes to a grinding halt because people are looking at the planes
flying into O'hare. Right across from the Rosemont Horizon (Allstate
Center, whatever), there is a runway, and the planes fly over
the tollway and land there. As soon as you pass that runway, the
traffic opens right up! People are watching 747s skim over their
cars! I am convinced of it. Everyday, it backs up right there,
and there's no toll for another 2 miles! It has to be the planes.
It's just my theory...
Love
the show!
Melanie
John Replied . .
.
As you know, my solution
to the various back ups on area roads is the Mandatory Relocation
Program. Governor Ryan, after the lottery drawing, would use the
same ping pong balls to draw social security numbers. Your number
comes up: you gotta move. To New Mexico. Or Spain. There are just
too many of us around here and unfortunately, my program won't
eliminate the Ohare Gaper problem.
I have heard your complaint
before, though. And wait! Here it is:
The Mandatory O'Hare
Relocation Program.
Thanks, John Williams
You Wrote . . .
Subject: Are we good
parents?
Date: 9/10/99 10:55 AM
John, Hello.
Heard your promo on
going to see "The Sixth Sense" and having an 8 year old attend.
My husband and I (who have a year old baby) went to see "The Mummy"
(9:30 show) a few months ago and a couple not only brought their
4 year old but a baby in a child seat. I couldn't believe it!
The mother was breastfeeding the baby during the loudest part
of the movie. I don't get it!
Listen to you each weekend
cause unfortunately can't get you during the week - radio reception
bad and no sound card in the old PC.
Have a good weekend.
Terry
John Replied . .
.
When I get to be king,
ain't gonna be no kids at movies like that. Or breasts. Unless
they're up on the screen, of course.
Thanks for trying to
listen. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: T.Jefferson
Date: 9/9/99 9:54 AM
Next time TJ is your
guest please ask him about his cluster headaches..and what did
he do for them?
Peace Begonia,
Chuck Zettle
Deerfield, Wi
John Replied . .
.
You bet we will. And
tune in, September 20 for his next visit. JW
You Wrote . . .
FW:
A REAL fantasy
Date: 8/31/99 7:31 AM
WHAT
MEN DO NOT KNOW
Ask any man, and he will tell you that any woman's ultimate fantasy
is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a
recent sociological study, it appears that MOST men do not realize
that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other man is
cleaning.
John
Replied . . .
Wonderful.
Thanks Barb. JW
You Wrote . . .
Subject: The Gove
Date: 8/24/99 12:26 AM
John I was wondering
what you thought of the Honorable Jesse Ventura's refering Sunday
night's match here at the Target center in Minneapolis? There
has been a lot of people talking around Minnesota that has embrassed
the office. I personal think that what he does on his own time
is his business, this state is also made that he will earn close
to a million dollars off the royalties, from the sale of tee shrits.
Bob Lobeck
Minneapolis, Mn
have a good day
John Replied . .
.
We had a rousing discussion
about Governor Ventura on the show yesterday. If you eliminated
the profit incentives, I wonder how many of these things h