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You Wrote, John Replied:
Selections from John's E-Mail:

(e-mail messages may be posted or used on-air)

You Wrote:
From: faithden
Sent: Friday, February 24, 2006 4:00 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: fred

John:

I love you all the time, except ............when you trash your poor puppy Fred. I Hate You right now.
I'll get over it

Faith
Janesville, WI

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, February 24, 2006 6:03 PM
To: 'faithden@charter.net'
Subject: RE: WEBMAIL: fred


I hope you do! Especially since when it comes to Fred, my bark is bigger than my bite, if you will. When I come home every night, I ALWAYS greet Fred first and it is such a warm and happy dance we do that more often than not we both wet the the floor. John Williams


You Wrote:
From: CHJEEP
Sent: Wednesday, November 02, 2005 3:56 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Bird Flu


John,
I heard that the Bush administration has copies of documents showing that a flock of chickens in the former Soviet Union have bought aluminum tubes that can used only to make bird flu.

Clyde, Elmhurst


You Wrote:
From: donald
Sent: Tuesday, June 21, 2005 9:40 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: Keyboard in the dishwasher


Dear Mr. Williams;
I heard the suffestion on your program for washinf the keyboard of a PC in the dishwasher. Well, I tried it, and aside from a gew of the keys gallinf ogg, my keyboard works freat now$
Sincerely,
donald


You Wrote:
From: Gloria
Sent: Wednesday, June 22, 2005 4:18 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: John...your two big whoppers at 4:15!

It's not William Finch in "Broadcast News", it's PETER FINCH in "NETWORK"!

Love you, ya goofy guy!

Gloria Montgomery
Burr Ridge

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, June 22, 2005 5:47 PM
To: 'Gloria'
Subject: RE: John...your two big whoppers at 4:15!


Still, I was pretty close.

Thanks for watching, John Williams


You Wrote:
From: Kem
Sent: Wednesday, February 02, 2005 3:27 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."

...not, "Me and..................

Jeez Louise! You drive me up a freakin' wall with that. You know
better.

John replied...
To: Kem
Subject: RE: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."

I KNOW I know better.
But I CAN'T stop.
jw

You Wrote:
Sent: Thursday, February 03, 2005 3:56 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: RE: It's, "Some 45-year-old guys and I....."

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!


You Wrote:
From: npsheb
Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2005 5:54 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: CBS

Before we fire everyone at CBS for not getting all the facts right, maybe we revisit the "golf ball and the hurricane" report.

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2005
To: npsheb

Agreed. Matt should be fired.


You Wrote:
From: Mandy
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 4:32 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com

Why does producer Matt always sound like he is on a phone? Is he sitting
at home on his couch listening to the show and just calls in from time
to time with his two cents? If so, how do I get his job?

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 6:07 PM
To: 'mandy'
Subject: RE:

He's on the phone, though he is here, on the other side of the glass, because it makes his voice seem inferior to mine and this way I keep the rabble down.

Resumes accepted.

JW


You Wrote:
From: novak
Sent: Tuesday, November 30, 2004 7:11 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: WEBMAIL: memento film

The special edition of the Memento DVD has a hidden feature that allows you to see the film in chronological order. The DVD interface on the second disk takes you through a multiple choice survey; select 'c' as the answer to all the questions presented to you. After about five questions, you should be shown four small pictures involving a woman who is changing a flat tire. You are asked to arrange the pictures in correct order by using the arrow keys on your remote changer. If you arrange the pictures in REVERSE order, the film, including the color and black and white scenes, should play in correct chronological order. The film will start by playing the credits backwards and then the film will play in normal form. I cannot remember if after rearranging the flat tire pictures you have to actively leave that element of the DVD to have the film play, or if the film automatically plays for you once you are done moving the pictures. I hope this has not been too tedious an expl! anation, I heard you the other day on your show saying you wished there was a way to view the film in order and I thought you might be interested in this hidden feature. Many DVDs come with hidden features, some like this one are very interesting and add to the enjoyment of the film. Thanks for taking the time to read this, have an enjoyable holiday season.

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, December 01, 2004 10:27 AM
To: 'novak'
Subject: RE: WEBMAIL: memento film


Ha! I knew it! Wait, I didn't know it. But I wondered. Thanks for the help. I"ll pass this along. John Williams


You Wrote:
From: Purdue1014
Sent: Tuesday, November 16, 2004 4:13 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: ?

Dear King,

I love your show ect,ect (normal stuff)

I hate to bring back possible bad wounds, but I couln't listen to your show the day after you went to the LaGrange Park YMCA and tried to pull a Johnny Depp canoe stunt, and what was the result?

Thanks King F,

Loyal Listener from Western Springs

ps What ever happened to Matts pen straping rocket to Mars?

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, November 26, 2004 4:32 PM
To: 'Purdue1014@aol.com'
Cc: Bubala, Matt
Subject: RE: ?


We couldn't get that thing to sink enough to walk on the bottom. We tried everything! It was....funny and exhausting. I took photos to post on our site. I can't find them.

MAtt's mini-NASA project is stalled in the windmills of his mind.

JW


You Wrote:
From: Joseph G. Hurley
Sent: Thursday, November 04, 2004 8:37 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Election Rumors

Your Majesty,

Is there any truth to the rumor that after John Kerry voted for himself, he flip flopped and voted for Bush??

Have a nice day!
Joseph G. Hurley

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, November 04, 2004 10:29 AM
To: 'Joseph G. Hurley'
Subject: RE: Election Rumors

Two words: Fun Nee. Thanks for the smile. JW


You Wrote:
From: Peter Goss Jr.
Sent: Tuesday, October 19, 2004 8:10 AM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Good day John...


I am a huge Cubs fan and a big fan of your show. I also support your campaign for King and hope you get there one day as you have many fine ideas. That being said...I'm a bit confused. I've been listening the past couple weeks and heard that you were going to vote for Kerry. Everyone is entitled to their own vote, but looking at history, your choice confuses me. Over a year ago, President Bush invaded Iraq due to the intelligence three governments (including our own, England and Russia) supplied him that said Saddam had WMDs. Now, we've been told for the past twelve years by three administrations and every nation in the UN that he had something. Why else would they have continued to pass the resolutions that they did in the UN. We now know that the big four countries that didn't want to go to war with us were benefiting financially with Saddam in power. Hmmm...why wouldn't they join us in attacking if they said he had the weapons? Could it be because they were doing illegal activity with him. However, that (as I'm sure you agree) should have no emphasis on why the President went after Saddam. After 9/11 (the favorite slogan for all Bush officials), the world changed. I don't understand the thinking in one's head that after that day in September, if the entire world says he has WMDs, why you would want to let him do anything with them. True, now we know he didn't have them. But, is that really a chance any one of us would have wanted to take? Kerry even has said that he was a threat to our security and needed to take him out. He looked at the same intelligence Bush did. Heck he's on the intelligence committee. So, Iraq is the one thing that won't get Bush your vote eh? Something just doesn't add up. It frightens me...Kerry winning. The same man that said we needed to get UN approval before we commit troops to anything is the same person that voted not to help Kuwait 12 plus years ago when the UN asked us to go get him. This is really a man you want, your kids to be going to school with, in office? Please, please, please explain.

Peter

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, October 19, 2004 12:47 PM
To: 'Peter Goss Jr'
Subject: RE: Good day John...


Thanks for listening and writing, and as a fellow Cubs fan, agonizing. I can't explain it much further than that. You make an interesting point here - the whole world was wrong and it is a gamble we couldn't afford to have taken - but I see the stream of events differently. My view is that we're the nation that lead the attack and history shows we acted with unnecessary force. What scares me more than a Kerry presidency is another generation of terrorists we've created here.

Here's the funny thing. If Bush wins, I'm not going to complain from the sidelines. This country is divided on this thing, but the process is better than any one of the candidates. So if it is Bush, I'll tell myself and our radio audience that 50+% of the people can't be THAT wrong. So let's move forward and make the best of this thing.

That, or me being King.

I wish all my incoming email were as reasoned as yours. Sincerely, John Williams


You Wrote:
From: Jkstay
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2004 3:47 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Mesopotamia

John, where were you when you took World History in high school - remember the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers in the "Cradle of Civilization"? That's where our nation is at war!!!!!! Please apologize to your World History teacher!!!!!

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2004 6:55 PM
To: 'Jkstay'
Subject: RE: Mesopotamia


Okay, I will. But I don't remember his name. Or her name. I forget. JW


You Wrote:
From: Laverne
Sent: Thursday, September 09, 2004 6:43 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: A little musing

John, today I was just musing a bit - I ride an hour home each evening from a Grand Rapids job to Holland. The thought was running through my head that we might have learned some quite clear lessons from the 9/11 thing, which I hadn't heard anyone talking about.

One (or two) of the terrorists' picks was New York. I know that is a huge American Capitalist financial center and all, and represents our monitary and things successes, but it is also is a very well known stronghold of some of our outspokenest and recognized ultra liberal and Democrat population. The plans for this triumph against "us", some of us, were laid out and set up during 8 years of our most ultra liberal and Democrat dominated national governing trio, Hillary, Bill, and Al (since LBJ). Why might that have inspired this ? - - - - So, now if we put up Kerry-Edwards , probably the most liberal, left, Democrat current folks, even if you measure by voting records, why would these radical, fundamentalist, ultra conservative, terrorists go away or stop their effort which began as it did ? They hate liberal, gay, bare it all, Hollywood ideoligies. No ? How can anyone, believe that electing Kerry would reduce the threat ? Seems based on history, it'd increase it, just naturally. And on top of that, wouldn't it be wise to recognize that Chicago isn't in this regard, any different from New York ? I'm sure Daly has thought of this, but I've not heard any mention of it. Maybe you better just protect your ass by not voting for Kerry/Edwards. Oh OH Oh, I said it.

Your thoughts ?

Vern

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Friday, September 10, 2004 12:43 PM
To: 'Laverne'
Subject: RE: A little musing

Thanks for the note, Vern. If the ideology of the president has a lot to do with terrorist activities, then I don't see why they chose to attack us when a republican was in office. My plan to protect my ass is to do whatever I think will keep terrorists from attacking us. I think that you can't win a war or terrorism per se, any more than you can win the wars on poverty or disease. They're all just unfortunate parts of the human condition. But I do think you confine these things. I think you can stop them from spreading. And I believe that antagonizing these people - which something like the war in Iraq does - is an invitation to spread hatred of America. We can win any traditional war and we should strike back at anyone who strikes us first. We should even take steps to safeguarding ourselves from future attacks. But personally, I don't feel safer now that we've preemptively invaded Iraq. For that reason alone I can't imagine voting for Bush.


You Wrote:
From: M.M.Freeman
Sent: Tuesday, September 07, 2004 8:19 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: JUST THE FACTS

John, it's always been apparent to me that you are a liberal and perhaps
leaning toward ultra liberal, but today I saw (heard) you in a new light.
You stated that you didn't think that Michael Moore's film was very
accurate or something to that effect. Wow, John, I ordinarily would have expected
you to believe Moore's garbage totally and completely. Hooray for you, maybe
your mind has some openess. I'm not a fan of President Bush, and Mr.
Kerry is no better, but I do believe that the President has been honest if not
misled in some instances. And while I'm an independent, I tend to lean
to the right on many issues. I'm now going to try and have an open mind
listening to you just as you seem to have had an open mind about Michael
Moore's trash. Maybe you would be a good King! (:-)

Murray

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
To: 'M.M.Freeman'
Sent: 9/8/04 11:14 AM
Subject: RE: JUST THE FACTS

I think I am now a Republicat. Conservative fiscally - taxes, spending,
etc - but to the left on social issues: abortion, gay rights, guns, the
Cubs, etc. But none of that blinds me from the obvious: Moore isn't a
documentarian as much as an editorialist. And Bush isn't evil, he's
dumb. And I would be a good King, but lately I'm not sure who would
want to be in the Kingdom. Either way, thanks for listening and
writing. John Williams


You Wrote...
From: Gail Poisson
Sent: Thursday, August 26, 2004 5:12 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Your Kingship Competition


John,
Your campaign for kingship is in trouble. I saw a bumper sticker today that read " Elect Jesus as king." That is pretty strong competition.
Gail

John replied...
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, August 26, 2004 5:33 PM
To: 'Gail'
Subject: RE: Your Kingship Competition


I'm so toast.

In fact, even if He was toast, He could divide it into ulimited toasts.

Thanks for the heads up.

JW


You Wrote . . .
From: Randy Stukenberg
Sent: Friday, March 12, 2004 5:45 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: John, you WILL drown...something you haven't thought about

John-

Yes, it will work, but...as you breathe in, you will suck the air in the milk jug into your lungs. Water will replace this air, and before you get a half a breath, you will be breathing in the water that replaced the air. Even with a larger bucket, you may get a couple of breathes, but as you breathe out, you will fill the air with carbon dioxide that you are breathing out and you will asphixiate. A canoe would work because you have a large volume of air, if you could get it to the bottom of the pool.

Good Luck!

Randy
Byron, IL

John Replied....

Memo to self....thanks for the note. JW


You Wrote . . .
Sent: Thursday, February 12, 2004 3:54 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: Balance?

JW:

Since you've had so much fun bashing Bush the last few weeks, it will be interesting to see if you will similarly be harsh on Kerry for his intern bimbo eruption.

Frank Oelerich

John Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, February 12, 2004 3:59 PM
Subject: RE: Balance?


I think we've started. I wonder if the intern in question has receipts proving he was with her? JW


You Wrote . . . 
From: Patrick
Sent: Wednesday, April 30, 2003 2:42 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: who cares

John;
Who the hell cares about the college coach from Iowa? Certainly not "GN listeners .....give it up for Christ sake.

--- Patrick

John Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, April 30, 2003 4:04 PM
Subject: RE: who cares

It was Iowa State, but I don't think that changes your point, right? Just wondering. JW


You Wrote . . . 
From: Adam
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 3:33 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: The echo in the phone

That you get when you talk to people in Texas is due to the large empty space in their heads.

I left Chicago to move to Houston 2 years ago, and I have fled like a refugee this year. It is the most awful place in the USA to live and I am aware of places such as Gary Indiana and Detroit Michigan.

John Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 4:46 PM
To: 'Adam'
Subject: RE: The echo in the phone

I see. Sooooo....you don't like Texas, right? JW

You Wrote . . .
From: Adam
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 4:36 PM
To: Williams, John (WGN)
Subject: RE: The echo in the phone

You might say that. And here is the list of reasons why:

1) Road construction that never ends. One of my relatives decided Texas only has equipment to tear things up and no equipment to put things back together.
2) Mosquitoes in January…Nothing more needs to be said.
3) Mildew. I think it is the state flower.
4) Lowest air quality in the nation.
5) Enron
6) Flooding. Who builds a Medical Center in a flood plain?
7) Did you know Texas is full of Texans? Why we ever fought Mexico for the Country of Texas I can’t understand.

When I left, as soon as the car tires crossed the state line and I was back on American soil, I pulled over and burned every map of Texas I had…It was very therapeutic.


You Wrote . . .
Sent: Wednesday, February 05, 2003 2:13 PM
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject:

Well John when are you leaving...LeBron James was cleared and yesterday you said if he was you were gone....

Linda Hauser

John Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Wednesday, February 05, 2003 2:21 PM
To: 'Linda Hauser'
Subject: RE:


OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH CANNNNNADAAAAAAAAAAA! JW


You Wrote . . .
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: The answers to your 10 questions...

The 6th question about Wrigley Field is just NOT what every Chicagoan should know, I've lived here my whole life and knew all the other answers but I am a White Sox fan, of course you working for the Cubs and Tribune would never know that there was another baseball team in this town, but Sox fans or if your not a baseball fan would not know that! But that's not important! TO ANYONE! Were you even born here? I doubt it, like all of WGN that claims to be all Chicago, most of your announcers are from small little towns like Spike from Iowa and boy can you tell! Also your 3rd question about tallest buildings, well John Hancock is 100 stories high, not including attennas, and Aon is only like 80 or 85 at the most, so get your facts straight then maybe, just maybe you too can pretend to be a real Chicagoan! Gheez

John Replied....
From: Williams, John (WGN)
Sent: Tuesday, February 04, 2003 12:46 PM
Subject: RE: The answers to your 10 questions...

Tmac! I was born here and the Aon building is like about 9 feet taller than the Hancock! We're not counting the antennae because that isn't the "building!" The number of stories has nothing to do with the height! We did look it up! Geez! What is it with you Sox fans! I think you may have a point about #6, however! I'm considering dumping it! Gheez whiz! JW!


You Wrote . . . 
Sent: Wednesday, January 22, 2003 11:34 PM
To: JohnWilliams@wgnradio.com
Subject: You really must love yourself

John,
I've listen to WGN for the past 50 years and you are the first WGN personality, I have turned off. You totally went over the line when you belittled, berated and castigated Annie and the rest of the staff who enjoyed the movie "CHICAGO."
Well, it look like the foreign press and the general public at large disagree with you!
Once again you have allowed your Alligator mouth override your Humming bird ass, You can be sure, I will no longer be listening to WGN on the go home.
Your over bearing Ego has cost WGN another listener.
You really get under my skin when you have a listener who you disagree with. You are very rude to say the least.
Hopefully you will be replaced in the near future.
Donald
Antioch, IL.

John Replied....
Sent: Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:01 AM
Subject: RE: You really must love yourself


Dear Donald, Oh well, thank you for giving my show a try. I can't say you didn't try to listen. I hope you will nonetheless listen to Spike and the rest of the gang. And I'll tell Annie and Dave you said Hi.

Hummingbird ass. I like that. JW


You Wrote . . .
To: johnwilliams@wgnradio.com
Sent: Tuesday, January 21, 2003 6:37 PM
Subject: whaaa???

how did you decide that "twice as cold" was equal to half way between 0 and absolute 0?

for all we know, a difference of 20 degrees could be twice as cold. or 50 degrees. the scale could change as it got colder (e.g. 80 degrees could be twice as hot as 70, but 100 could be twice as hot as 80.)

in other words, it could be exponential increases or decreases. just like seizemographs (sp?): 6 on the richter scale is 10 times worse than 5, so 5.1 would be twice as bad as 5.

try to decide how much hungrier you would be if you were twice as hungry as you are now. you'd probably be able to eat twice as much? if you are twice as cold, maybe the measure would be twice as many blankets to keep you as warm as you would be if it were zero? i'm sure you'd need a lot fewer blankets for that than you'd need if it were halfway to absolute zero.

yes, i vote for the blanket answer. twice as cold as zero is the temparature at which you'd need twice as many blankets to keep warm.

~chris

John Replied....
You are MUCH better at this than me.

We said twice as cold as zero (F) would be - 229 since that was half-way to absolute zero (F). (A NASA website was our source.) When anyone asks, in the future, I'm going to refer them - and NASA - to you.

Thanks for lsitening, JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Your Show
Date: 1/18/00 9:04 AM

John I love your show .

Thought you might enjoy this if you havent already seen it .

Keeping Great Company -- Can you imagine working at the following Company?

It has a little over 500 employees with the following statistics:

  • 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
  • 7 have been arrested for fraud
  • 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
  • 117 have bankrupted at least two businesses
  • 3 have been arrested for assault
  • 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
  • 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
  • 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
  • 21 are current defendants in lawsuits
  • In 1998 alone, 84 were stopped for drunk driving

Can you guess which organization this is? See below...

It's the 535 members of your United States Congress. The same group that perpetually cranks out hundreds upon hundreds of new laws designed to keep the rest of us in line.

John Replied . . .

It's a great story, isn't it? Paul Harvey even reported it on his nationally syndicated radio show. We looked in to it, too, and discovered - or are certain enough - that it isn't true. The story is impossible to verify and no one is taking credit? Some parts of it might be true and the point it makes, or is trying to make, is a good one. But the figures are fiction. Darn!

Thanks for listening,
John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: (no subject)
Date: 1/14/00 2:31 PM

Hi John,

A bit of constructive criticism... you really over due the use of the word "opulent" everytime you mention the studio. The word is being overworked, in fact I rather doubt that it is the appropriate word for defining your studio. If you are using it as a joke... it is getting old. If you actually like the looks of the studio, be creative and use some other words to discribe it. You do have an interesting show with some great guests. Keep up the good work.

John Replied . . .

The funny thing is, they really are opulent. And yes, I do like using the word. Always have. Can't explain it. I know it is annoying to some of you and I'm trying to be more judicious.

Yackety Smackety.
John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Y10K
Date: 1/13/00 7:22 PM

Do you think the computer geeks had the foresight to add a third digit to the date field, or are we going to have to go through this whole thing again in 8000 years? Love your show.

John Replied . . .

Three words. OH MY GOD! Thanks for listening. Okay, that's six. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Latest Photo
Date: 1/11/00 11:29 PM

John,

you have more nerve than sense. Quite a spectacle. By the way, did anyone (or everyone) ever mention you sound so much like Alan Alda? I only get to hear you to or from work and have been waiting for someone to make that remark. All at WGN keep up the great shows.

Bonna

John Replied . . .

Actually, I hear that all the time. About Alda. Now that you mention it, the sense part rings a bell, too. Thanks for listening, John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: a constructive criticism
Date: 1/11/00 10:08 PM

John,

This has been bugging me for a long time, and I thought I'd go ahead and get it off my chest. You have a habit of doing something that really annoys me. Let's call it cliffhanger syndrome. You start discussing a subject, really get into it, then all of a sudden you stop and say you'll get to the rest of it sometime later in the week.

You used to do it constantly. Then, either you settled down, or I stopped catching it as much (due to my listening pattern no doubt,which I'll discuss in a moment). Yesterday, you did it again. You were discussing some of the best scenes from movies, and how one was out of place compared to the rest (the final scenes in Casablanca, and Citizen Kane are the ones I remember). But instead of telling us about the incongruous scene, or opening the lines up for guesses, you went the cliffhanger route again.

In my line of work, I am in and out of my truck dozens upon dozens of times everyday. I can't stay tuned in every minute of every day to here "the rest of the story", to steal a phrase from Paul Harvey. I'm sure there are many other listeners who are in the same situation.

I would guess that you have a large number of listeners who start their morning with WGN, and listen throughout the rest of the day. Therefore, you don't need to bribe them by using teasers, and getting to the good parts sometimes days later.

In the future, could you please try to remember that there are a lot of us who listen whenever we can....but can't listen whenever we want.

There. I feel better now.

John Replied . . .

Sometimes I (we) string you all along on purpose, hoping you'll listen longer. Other times, there really isn't more time and we finish the story after the news or the next day. (Sometimes it's an ongoing story, like the summarizing I've been doing of The Bob Love Story.) So I'm sorry if you can't hear the conclusions all the time, but I'm afraid it's part of the show.

However, sometimes - and yesterday was a good example - I could have solved the dilemma, didn't and should be called on it. I said that last year there were four movie scenes the Academy said were the greatest of the century. The final scene of Casablanca, Citizen Kane, Sunset Boulevard and one other that was hardly in the class of these three. What was the scene, I asked, promising to answer it later this week." Shame on me.

Thanks for listening.
John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: streaking pic
Date: 1/11/00 9:45 PM

Are you smoking a cigarette?

John Replied . . .

Nope. Never have, never will. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Streaking
Date: 1/11/00 6:39 PM

Hey John,

I couldn't wait to see the picture of you streaking and when Steve and Johnnie were conversing about it, I jumped out of bed and made 5 copies. Now being a few weeks short of 70 years of age, jumping out of bed in the middle of the night is a bit of a stretch. Keep up the good work and you will never grow old. (hopefully in years but never in mind). Thanks for the jolt . My pacemaker needed it.

Grandma Joan

John Replied . . .

Here to serve... Thanks for listening. And jumping...JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: photos
Date: 1/11/00 5:54 PM

I left Ill. last week and since I'm now in Fla enjoying the beautiful weather the only blip in my world was being homesick for WGN. Of course once I looked at the photos on the website I decided not to be homesick any more. J.P.

John Replied . . .

Now you know why they call it IL. Thanks for listening. Enjoy the weather. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: organization
Date: 1/11/00 4:18 PM

You are supposed to be the organized one (certainly not Bob or Spike). How come Milt can tell us what is going to be on Extension 720 for the rest of the month and you only have one listing.

John Replied . . .

'Cause Milt books a month ahead. I book tomorrow's show today. Sometimes, tomorrow. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: (no subject)
Date: 1/10/00 9:35 PM

I can't believe you did that! Wish I would have been there! I couldn't have done better myself.....well, maybe I could have, but not when you did it! Best of luck - like I said, wish I could have been there for the EVENT!

John Replied . . .

Thanks, Kathleen. Next year, it may go public. (With an L) I hope you join us then, if infact it happens and if infact I still, you know, have a job here. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Do you it!
Date: 1/10/00 9:09 PM

President Clinton is really good stuff! Do you do his voice? Hope someday I can get a CD of all the conversations. Bob is good, Spike is good but your the best thing that ever happened to WGN! Been a listener of WGN for years but your show is the best! This is not your Mom!

Wayne

John Replied . . .

But wait! My mother's name IS Wayne! Coincidence....? JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: What a bod
Date: 1/10/00 9:03 PM

John,

after looking at your picture it appears you have the perfect outfit for Bourbon Street, New Orleans. What I mean is as we approach Mardi Gras you would fit right in and no one would make a fuss. In fact john you would probably have more clothing on than most of the revelers at Mardi Gras. What a beautiful thing. Do your children have a copy to hold over you as you refuse to meet their demands?

John Replied . . .

Rhonda, Thanks for writing and for caring. My children are now in a pediatric counseling center for the children of the criminally insane and/or talk show hosts. All the best, JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: I give up!
Date: 1/10/00 8:14 PM

Hey John,

After much thought, I still can't pin down your NYE costume! I've seen dead fish with more color.!!?? Perhaps a living sculpture...in pizza dough? Poster boy for Jama Magazine? I have done crazy things..but...man...that took took sand! Your poor wife! RJH


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Get some on
Date: 1/9/00 5:50 PM

Are you going to this every year??????? put some meat on those bones, you look like your starving!!

John Replied . . .

Thanks for listening...I've thought about doing this again, next year. But I probably shouldn't. Really. JW


You Wrote . . .

Date: 1/9/00 4:14 PM john, john, john can the gay pride parade be too far behind?

John Replied . . .

I will not be marching in the gay pride parade. Who would follow?


You Wrote . . .

Subject: the picture
Date: 1/9/00 12:38 AM

hi John,

I just want to say I give you a lot of credit for the jog around the block. It sure was a different way to start off the 21st century. I would not have the nerve to do something like that. I hope you have a very happy 2000. Cheri

John Replied . . .

Merci, Cheri.


You Wrote . . .

Date: 1/8/00 11:34 PM

Hi John,

Why can't I find your New Years Eve picture--the one all the world is talking about? All my friends without computers have given the word that I have to make copies so they can see you. HELP!!!!!!!

A WGN Fan, (Spike knows me aka "Bone Marrow Butt, Jean")

John Replied . . .

Wiser people than me should be responding to you from WGN Radio on how to access the photo. Wiser people than me should have stopped me that night, too. My best to the neighborhood. JW

ed.: The infamous Millenium Streak photo (NOT FOR SENSITIVE EYES)


You Wrote . . .

Subject: New Years Eve antics
Date: 1/7/00 9:37 PM

Hey John,

I love your New Years picture. On New Years Eve 10 years ago, my husband (my ex now) and I were playing the quarters game with a bunch of friends and the loser was supposed to put on a ladies sexy nightie and run around the neighborhood. Of course the guys were hoping one of the ladies would lose, but it was my husband who lost. He proceeded to put on this very sexy, very skimpy, nightie, complete with fish net stockings and garter belt. All this he wore with his work boots. Carrying a fake Christmas tree, he ran around the neighborhood. It really was a sight when he came back around by our house and there were 2 dogs barking and running along with him! New Years is a time to have fun and I'm glad to see you had a lot of it yourself! Happy 2000, John, to you and your family.

Gayle

John Replied . . .

My run looks tame, now. Happy New Year. JW


Your Wrote . . .

Date: 1/7/00 9:26 PM

Hi John!

I'm one of your fans until I saw that streaking thing on the web. So what have you got stored in that underwear you're wearing? And-------are you "smoking" a cigarette? I can't picture you a smoker but then again you do have zillions of weird ideas.

Please don't disgrace yourself like this - for the sake of WGN radio. I thought you had more class!

How does Brenda put up with you?

John Replied . . .

I can't answer the last question. The flashlight is in my underware. In my mouth is one of those paper horns you blow at midnight. Happy new year, JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: The Streak
Date: 1/7/00 9:08 PM

I hope nobody confuses you with Cal Ripken, Jr.

John Replied . . .

Happens all the time. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: New photo
Date: 1/7/00 8:04 PM

John,

Nice pic!!!! I have to assume that you were feeling NO pain. Do try to keep in mind that this station is a "family radio station". LOL

John Replied . . .

Here's the scary part. In the picture, I'm sober. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: photo
Date: 1/7/00 7:53 PM

awesome. Should be attire for political speaches, or mascot for a new political party. The one with nothing to hide. (wouldn't be appropriate for our Governor).

Bud
Urbana, IL

John Replied . . .

Good line, Bud. If I run, you're my PR guy. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Photo
Date: 1/7/00 5:04 PM

Too cute for me. Keep up the good work, love your show.

Renée

P.S. Love the clean shaven......face.

John Replied . . .

I'm reassured. I stand there 92% nude and your reaction is, "Where's the goatee." Thanks for the kind words and for listening, John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: That picture
Date: 1/7/00 4:19 PM

I have decided not to watch your radio station any more. Disgusting!

John Replied . . .

There's an expression "face made for radio." The term may need amending.

Thanks for listening, anyway...JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Thank You
Date: 1/7/00 4:08 PM

Bravo! You are truly the best. Not sure if it was by choice but glad to see you have the courage to be displayed "au" natural! You are often the reason for people staring at me driving down the road wondering why I am laughing out loud! Wish I could listen more often - guess that is why I LOVE Saturdays! I could listen to you all day but I do love Spike and the Sports Central boys! Keep up the incredible work John - And since I work for the Cancer Society - I am glad you don't visit the Tanning Beds!!

Sincerely
Shari

John Replied . . .

Thanks, Shari. Several had said I SHOULD have tanned first. Or lifted weights. Or left town....I hope you stay tuned to WGN, JohnWilliams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: New Year's Picture
Date: 1/7/00 2:18 PM

Some people have to LIGHTEN UP!!! I think what you did took guts. I don't know why you did it but I'm sure it was just for FUN!!! I love to laugh and feel sorry for those people who can't. Keep up the good work on your show. I enjoy listening to you. Sheila

John Replied . . .

I guess the fact that I was returning home from church when the photo was snapped turned some people off...Thanks for listening. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Your Midnight Run
Date: 1/4/00 11:49 PM

Dear John,

I listen to your show quite often and have enjoyed most of your programs, but I nearly had an accident when I heard you talking about your run around the block. It was so funny!! It reminded me of some of the crazy things my Dad would do. I will always remember how funny my father could be, and I am sure your sons will remember how funny you can be. Keep up the good work and I look forward to seeing the pictures in the Photo Gallery.

Sincerely,
Art McPheron

John Replied . . .

You are kind. And hopefully farsighted. I'm waiting for the photos, too. We'll announce it loudly when they get up there....JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: names of football bowls
Date: 12/31/99 7:48 AM

How can you criticize the use of corporate names for bowl games, when you no longer say this is "WGN Radio" - you must add a "Tribune Station" or similar. The Tribune is your sponsor, just like Nokia or Qualcom or any other. Think!!! S. Tillman

John Replied . . .

Maybe so...The Tribune is our parent company, technically, and in fact buys very little advertising here if any. But I see your point, sort of.

Thanks for listening and happy Nokia/Tuppperware New Year. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Ryan
Date: 12/30/99 6:37 AM

Ryan is governor of the state and head of the Republican party.

Ryan cannot deliver the Republican vote for the anti-crime bill.

All democrats voted FOR the bill. And you stupidly ask, "Why are the newspapers saying RYAN lost?"

Are you on the Republican payroll like Bob Collins?

John Replied . . .

yes. Just kidding. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Not With My Money You Don't
Date: 12/29/99 9:59 AM

John,

Of course, you don't mind spending $3,000,000 to bring a lot of potential trouble-makers into this country. You don't pay taxes in Chicago. You just earn your money there and rush off to spend it in the suburbs where you live.

Oh, by the way, who cares what they think in Cameroon or some of those other God-forsaken places? Let's keep America for Americans for a change. If you think there are other places worthy of note, why don't you simply pack up and move there? K

John Replied . . .

K....I don't know where to begin.... In closing, let me wish you a happy new year. Sincerely, John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: I hope you can help me.
Date: 12/29/99 8:34 PM

I was listening before Christmas and I heard you mention a new game that you played with your family. You said it was really fun. I think you said the name of the game was "Set." It was card game and you said the kids could play right along with the adults. Is this the right name of the game? If so, where did you get it? I live in Muskegon Michigan and I've looked around here for the game and can't find it. I'd appreciate it if you could give me the name and where to find it.

THANKS so much!!!!

John Replied . . .

Blurt is a game where you shout out the right answer; Tribond is one where you guess the common bond between three subjects and Say When is the game we play often where adults and kids guess approximate answers to various questions...Thanks for listening. I hope this helps. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Math lesson
Date: 12/28/99 10:56 PM

John, you sniveling idiot (a.k.a. drooling fool), Williams:

I was devastated to learn that you were as stupid as so many others who have bought into the popular culture thing of calling 12/31/1999 as the end or 01/01/2000 as the beginning of the 20th century or the second millenium. As your "commander" weather guy (his name isn't on the web site) said the other day, it's the millenium coming up only for those who can't count. If you can read either MS Excel or Lotus 1-2-3, you can see on the attachments how easy this Friday is not the end of the century or the millenium. A decade is 10 years starting with 1. Of course a century starts with a year ending in a "1" and ending in a zero. If you start counting pennies and stop at 1,999 of them, will a bank give you a $20 bill when you take them in? No, it won't, unless it is in a generous mood and rounds it up for you. You simply don't have 2000 years without 2000 years - all of them. You don't start the third millenium until you start counting with a 1 again. One of the few exceptions to such counting is the temperature which does have a "0", but it also has minus figures. Calendars don't have minuses and neither do ages (even if you put the battery in the clock backwards).

Frankly, I am ashamed to have one thing in common with you -- being a Saluki. It's not too late to redeem yourself - buck the popular culture idiocy. Stop propogating the lie -- the new century doesn't start 1/1/2000!!!!!! You've heard the old adage: if you repeat a lie often enough to enough people, it becomes the truth. To quote the great philosopher and deep thinker, Charlie Brown: "Arrggghhh!" JC

John Replied . . .

sorry. John williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Tuesday morning tip.
Date: 12/28/99 10:06 AM

Dear John-

(Jeez, when I was in the army, we got a three day pass for letters which were considered "Dear John" letters-which shows you what an old fart I am.)

Anyhow - I listened a couple of years ago, and some guest said something about a company caled Macromedia, which owns the patent for the digital tv broadcasting equipment.

So, I bought a little at about $16/per. Then last year, for xmas spending, I sold 2/3 for $45. It is now about $90!!! So, naturally when you discussed Botex, I immediately went to my on-line broker and discovered that there ain't no such symbol or company called Botex!! Sure, I'd buy a hundred or so at $1.28! My computer geek son turned me on to baanf as they were going to buy his company. I got it for $35 or so. The deal didn't go through, and it is now about $9! Oh he also told me about Sun Systems, so I got a little at $75, and it hasn't moved. I will ask him about Botex.

See what you can start? Well, you really knew that, didn't you?

O.F. across the lake in St. Joe.

John Replied . . .

congrats. sorry. etc. The info I have, as you heard, is from Joel Stein in this week's Time and his source is a porn star who has a friend who says he owns this cool company that makes tires that never wear out. If I can locate the stock symbol, I'm transferring my IRA and 401-K. Let me know if you find it and invest. John Williams

Hey, I hear it is Botex and the symbol is BTX or BTXIF. Always read and follow prospectus carefully. Close cover before striking..JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Sports Names
Date: 12/29/99 9:38 AM

HI John!

Heard your discussion this morning about sports names and even tho this is not a famous sports figure it is a great name. When my mother was in high school in the 1930's she went with the high school basketball star. His name was CHAMP RUSHING! Isn't that a great name? She didn't marry him but I have often thought how neat it would be to have a father with this name! Enjoy your show very much. Happy 2000!!

- Mitcheltree

John Replied . . .

Not that Mitcheltree isn't fun to say, too. Eh?

Thanks for listening and writing. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Computer Haiku (humor)
Date: 12/28/99 9:11 AM

Hi John,

I was listening to you this morning talking about the problems with your new computer and the lack of any helpful message to describe the problem. Someone sent this list of computer haiku to me, and I thought you might enjoy reading it.

Here's an additional haiku that I've written for you:

I cannot make toast
But since you've raised the question
Now you must reboot

Happy New Year!
Jody

In Japan, Sony Vaio machines have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with their own Japanese haiku poetry. Each only 17 syllables. Ingenious!

Windows NT crashed
I am the Blue Screen of Death
No one hears your screams

A file that big?
It might be very useful
But now it is gone

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located but
Countless more exist

Chaos reigns within
Reflect, repent, and reboot
Order shall return

ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have worked on
You ask way too much

Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that

First snow, then silence
This thousand dollar screen dies
So beautifully

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence
'My Novel' not found

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner

Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone

Three things are certain
Death, taxes, and lost data
Guess which one occured

You step in the stream
But the water has moved on
This page is not here

Out of memory
We wish to hold the whole sky
But we never will

Having been erased
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped

Serious error
All shortcuts have disappeared
Screen. Mind. Both are blank

John Replied . . .

You are lovely and talented. Many thanks, John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Bill Clinton
Date: 12/26/99 2:43 PM

John,

I love your talks with Pres. Clinton. Keep it up!

Deb from Madison, Wi.

John Replied . . .

Thanks. Sincerely, John Williams
...of the United States?


You Wrote . . .

Subject: hi ya
Date: 11/3/99 1:01 AM

Hey John,

I listen to you whenever I am in my van, and that is pretty much all the time. I enjoy your show, and I can't believe at the age of 33 I enjoy WGN. When I was growing up as a kid, my Mom always had WGN on in the morning and in her car. It used to drive me nuts. Keep up the great job. Is that you doing Clinton's voice? I know that's a real dumb question. Ha Ha Julie J

John Replied . . .

Julie, The first sign you're on your way to middle age is not only listening to WGN Radio, but LIKING it! Thanks for tuning in. (I went through the same thing as a kid; maybe our parents were so dumb afterall...) Sincerely, John Williams...of the United States?


You Wrote . . .

Subject: A Little Help From My Radio
Date: 10/30/99 12:31 PM

Dear Uncle Bobby, Kathy,Judy, Spike and John,

I am in need of some help from you, and the listeners of WGN. First let me tell you why. I live on a small farm in the Northwest Suburbs and my Dad and his parents (now deceased) moved here 50 years ago this September. This is our last Christmas on the farm and my brothers and I are looking to do something special for our parents. We have a 35'+ blue spruce and my Dad has always wanted to put lights in it for the holidays. I am going to be writing letters to family and friends to ask them to help pay for the cost of all the lights and the labor of putting the lights on. Thats where I need your help.

I need to find a company that has a "cherry-picker" and will also be able to put the lights on the tree. Both of my brothers are out of state so this is more like my little project and I would appreciate any help you can give me. If it would not be a problem could you maybe ask the listeners for help. This is a surprise so please don't mention any names.

Many Thanks

John Replied . . .

Carrie, this is no small request. At least I don't have any idea how to help; but I will solicit my audience and pass your e-mail address along if I get a caller or two who is interested. Yours is a very thoughtful idea. Good luck. John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Re: The Sixth Sense
Date: 9/10/99 5:19 PM

Funnie John - never thought about that. Could it be that in reality this movie actually is about his wife missing him, and she was dreaming the whole thing.

John Replied . . .

Bobby Ewing already did that. I don't know; the movie is still great. But that no one is addressing this point is puzzling to me. Thanks again, JW

You Wrote . . .

Subject: Traffic backups Author: mmostaccio@gr.com at Internet_TCO
Date: 9/10/99 1:15 PM

Hi John,

You were talking about why the traffic backs up and then opens up, and I have a theory about at least one of our roads. On the I-90 east bound, driving in from Schaumburg, I am convinced that traffic comes to a grinding halt because people are looking at the planes flying into O'hare. Right across from the Rosemont Horizon (Allstate Center, whatever), there is a runway, and the planes fly over the tollway and land there. As soon as you pass that runway, the traffic opens right up! People are watching 747s skim over their cars! I am convinced of it. Everyday, it backs up right there, and there's no toll for another 2 miles! It has to be the planes. It's just my theory...

Love the show!
Melanie

John Replied . . .

As you know, my solution to the various back ups on area roads is the Mandatory Relocation Program. Governor Ryan, after the lottery drawing, would use the same ping pong balls to draw social security numbers. Your number comes up: you gotta move. To New Mexico. Or Spain. There are just too many of us around here and unfortunately, my program won't eliminate the Ohare Gaper problem.

I have heard your complaint before, though. And wait! Here it is:

The Mandatory O'Hare Relocation Program.

Thanks, John Williams


You Wrote . . .

Subject: Are we good parents?
Date: 9/10/99 10:55 AM

John, Hello.

Heard your promo on going to see "The Sixth Sense" and having an 8 year old attend. My husband and I (who have a year old baby) went to see "The Mummy" (9:30 show) a few months ago and a couple not only brought their 4 year old but a baby in a child seat. I couldn't believe it! The mother was breastfeeding the baby during the loudest part of the movie. I don't get it!

Listen to you each weekend cause unfortunately can't get you during the week - radio reception bad and no sound card in the old PC.

Have a good weekend. Terry

John Replied . . .

When I get to be king, ain't gonna be no kids at movies like that. Or breasts. Unless they're up on the screen, of course.

Thanks for trying to listen. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: T.Jefferson
Date: 9/9/99 9:54 AM

Next time TJ is your guest please ask him about his cluster headaches..and what did he do for them?

Peace Begonia,
Chuck Zettle
Deerfield, Wi

John Replied . . .

You bet we will. And tune in, September 20 for his next visit. JW


You Wrote . . .

FW: A REAL fantasy
Date: 8/31/99 7:31 AM

WHAT MEN DO NOT KNOW
Ask any man, and he will tell you that any woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that MOST men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other man is cleaning.

John Replied . . .

Wonderful. Thanks Barb. JW


You Wrote . . .

Subject: The Gove
Date: 8/24/99 12:26 AM

John I was wondering what you thought of the Honorable Jesse Ventura's refering Sunday night's match here at the Target center in Minneapolis? There has been a lot of people talking around Minnesota that has embrassed the office. I personal think that what he does on his own time is his business, this state is also made that he will earn close to a million dollars off the royalties, from the sale of tee shrits.

Bob Lobeck
Minneapolis, Mn
have a good day

John Replied . . .

We had a rousing discussion about Governor Ventura on the show yesterday. If you eliminated the profit incentives, I wonder how many of these things h