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A
Lot Like Love (PG-13)
Nick: My God...these are two for the dumbest characters
in film history. Ashton Kutcher and Amanda Peet embarrass
them selves thoroughly in this idiotic romantic comedy. One
of the year’s worst.
Abandon
- (PG-13)
Steve Bertrand:
This is a disappointing follow to screenwriter/director Stephen
Gaghan's Oscar winning screenplay for Traffic. Katie Holmes
stars as an Ivy Leaguer haunted by lost love. Two years after
his disappearence, her boyfriend Embry (Charlie Hunnam) returns,
or does he. Benjamin Bratt is a detective with a dark past
tracking the missing student. There is nothing special here,
and the climax is so contrived it belongs on a made for tv
movie. There's a lot of talent involved in this film. Somehow,
they fell short. 
About
A Boy (PG-13)
Steve Bertrand: Paul
and Chris Weitz, with the help of co-screenwriter Peter Hedges
have delivered a fantastic film adaptation of Nick Hornby's
novel. Will (Hugh Grant) is a 38-year-old confirmed bachelor
who's convinced a life without commitments guarantees a life
without sadness. He's wrong, of course. It takes a 12-year-old
misfit named Marcus (Nicholas Hoult) to show him. Marcus is
being raised by his depressed mother Fiona (Tone Collette).
He turns to the reluctant Will for companionship and, eventually,
parental guidance. This film is fun and sweet and smart all
at the same time. 
Nick: -
Chris & Paul Weitz, the creators of the great American Pie
make a comeback (after the terrible Chris Rock vehicle, Down
to Earth,and the disappointing sequel to Pie) with one of
the best films of the year. A great, sincere, incredibly funny
and moving film, based on Nick Hornby's terrific follow up
to his novel High Fidelity (which was made into a pretty awful
film by Stephen Frears and star John Cusack). Hugh Grant plays
a 38 year-old selfish layabout who discovers that pretending
to be a single father is a great way to meet women. This leads
him to a fabulous relationship with a shy, awkward 12 year-old
outcast (a fantastic Nicholas Hoult) and his depressed single
mother (Toni Collette). This is a film of great heart and
humanistic comedy that, ironically because of its release
date, is the polar opposite of that ridiculous Star Wars movie,
which represents the worst in cold, unfeeling, money grubbing
Hollywood. You want a REAL movie? See this. You want a movie
that cares about characters and emotion? See this. You want
to line the pockets of a rich moron who makes terrible videogames
instead of movies? See Star Wars. I'll take this, the smart
real film, thank you very much......you can all have that
other thing. 
About
Schmidt - (R)
Nick: Jack
Nicholson plays a retired actuary whose life get examined
in this dark comedy/drama from the brilliant Alexander Payne
(Election). One minute you're laughing histerically, the next
your balling your eyes out. It walks a fine line between dark
satire and sad truths, and it does so beautifully. Nicholson
has never been better, giving a performance of heartbreaking
complexity without a lot of the "Jack" mannerisms,
and the rest of the cast (especially Kathy Bates and Dermot
Mulroney) give him ample support. A unique picture that is
both profoundly, deeply moving (the final shot is a killer)
and incredibly funny, it is also a film that will stay with
you for a very long time. This is smart filmmaking for adults
seeking a rich, rewarding experience. One of the year's best.
Adam
Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights - (PG-13)
Nick: Adam Sandler returns to his scatological, vulgar
self (after his brilliant turn in PT Anderson's masterpiece
Punch-Drunk Love) with this animated Holiday-themed nonsense
that is incredibly mean spirited. I will admit that I laughed
a few times, and I found the whole thing to be refreshingly
un-PC, but, it can only fuel the fire of Sandler's detractors,
and keep people from seeing his other movie, which is the
best film of the year.
Adaptation
- (R)
Steve Bertrand: This one gets points for creativity.
It's the story of screenwriter Charlie Kaufman (Nicholas Cage)
as he struggles to write a screenplay for the successful book
The Orchid Thief by Susan Orlean (Meryl Streep). Kaufman and
Orlean are real people. So, in essence, we have a screenwriter
who wrote himself into a script about a screenwriter writing
about a book written by a real life author. The trick is,
Kaufman (the writer, not the character) turns it all into
a fantastic fiction. Chris Cooper stands out as John Laroche.
Check this one out if your willing for a strange ride. 
Nick: A resoundingly clever film from the makers of
Being John Malkovich. The plot is too complicated and the
ideas are to dense to describe here. Let's just say that it's
a wholly original film that is about writing, flowers, depression,
love, movie making and more. It's a deceptive movie that,
during it's final half hour, becomes a sly, potent commentary
on movies. The film becomes something "else" almost
something more than simply a film. It's hard to describe,
but it's fabulous. Nicolas Cage (playing a dual
role) gives his best performance in years, while Meryl Streep,
and the great Chris Cooper do stellar work as well. Take a
chance, this is great stuff.
The
Adventures of Pluto Nash - (PG-13)
Nick: The less said about this film....the better.
Eddie Murphy can put this one right up there next to Best
Defense. 
The
Affair of the Necklace
Nick:-
Hilary Swank gets dressed up in a costume drama from the director
of Father of the Bride and I Love Trouble. She plays a poor
French aristocrat that plots to steal a valuable necklace.
With Adrien Brody, Christopher Walken (terrific as always)
and the great Jonathan Pryce. Despite the cast, the story
is poorly told and eventually falls apart completely. This
type of Merchant Ivory stuff either works well, or is stifling.
AFFLICTION
Nick: Nick Nolte's great performance is the reason
to see this rather unspectacular and often depressing film.
Nice support from Sissy Spaceck and James Coburn too. 
Against
the Ropes (PG-13)
Nick: An interesting true story about the first and
only professional female boxing promoter is watered down into
a lame TV-movielike drama that is ridiculously predictable
and sorely miscast. Poor Meg Ryan, she follows the disastrous
In the Cut with this turkey, and her performance here
seems desperate and sloppy. Omar Epps, despite a woefully
underwritten character, at least looks believable, which is
more than I can say about anything else in this film.
Agent
Cody Banks (PG)
Steve Bertrand: Malcolm
in the Middle's Frankie Muniz stars in this Spy Kids wannabe
about a suburban kid who is recruited by the CIA to save the
world. Cody (Muniz) was trained in a summer camp unbeknownst
to his parents. Unbeknownst to the CIA, no one taught him
how to talk to girls. That throws a wrench in things when
he's ordered to get close to the daughter of a scientist.
This is a corny, cheesey, predictable, but engaging, film.
There are more reasons not to like it than like it, but, in
the end, it leaves its audience entertained.
Agent
Cody Banks 2: Destination London (PG)
Nick: Frankie Muniz returns as the teen secret agent,
this time without Hilary Duff and with Anthony Anderson. If
you liked the first one, you'll probably like this one. I
was bored out of my mind, but it was better than The Perfect
Score...but not quite as good as Catch That Kid.
Rent the Spy Kids movies instead. 
A.I.
Artificial Intelligence (PG-13)
Nick: It's a trainwreck, oh it's an interesting trainwreck,
but it's still a trainwreck nonetheless. Steven Spielberg
brings Stanley Kubrick's final project to the screen and the
results are ugly. Spielberg's worse tendencies are everywhere
in this film and when he tries to imitate Kubrick, he seems
in way over his head. The only good thing that could really
be said about this film is that, unlike most of the garbage
that's out there today, this film really explores some profound
ideas. But, that still doesn't make it good. The first hour
is insufferable old-school Spielberg; the second third is
pure Kubrickian nightmare (falsely filtered through a goodie-two-shoes)
and the final third is a combination of the two. A wolf in
sheep's clothing is still a wolf, and a Spielberg in Kubrick's
clothing is still a Spielberg. Alternately interesting, boring,
ridiculous and filled with pure id (how many times can Spielberg
exorcise the effects of Bambi?)...the film is a great looking,
perfectly mounted, gigantic mess.
The
Alamo (PG-13)
Nick: Boring, but beautiful to look at, this historical
drama about the famous battles surrounding the Alamo ultimately
is a chore to sit through. Billy Bob Thornton's performance
as Davy Crockett is fun and many of the battle sequences are
spectacular, but it takes forever to get going and even longer
to end.
Alex
and Emma (PG-13)
Nick: Kate Hudson and Luke Wilson star in this weak
and uninvolving story about a writer who is forced to write
a book in record time and the stenographer who helps him.
The split level story isn't handled very well, and there is
little to no chemistry between the two leads. Wilson seems
completely bored, and Hudson (playing a few different roles
here) is completely false and quite annoying in spots. A pretty
bad romantic comedy.
Alexander
(R)
Nick: One of the years worst movies. An absolute
disaster of biblical proportions. Oliver Stone’s unintentionally
hilarious epic about Alexander the Great (played here, unfortunately
by the great Colin Ferrell) is about as ridiculous a movie
as you’re likely to see all year. The narrative is a complete
mess, the battle sequences are incomprehensible and the acting
is beyond over-the-top. The supporting cast includes a visibly
bored Val Kilmer, a horribly miscast Anjelina Jolie and a
laughably tired Anthony Hopkins. Only Rosario Dawson’s nude
scene inspires any kind of response, and that’s fleeting.
A horrible, horrible film.
Alfie
(R)
Nick: Another unnecessary remake, this one starring
the ubiquitous Jude Law as the title cad (a role Michael Caine
originated). Charle’s Shyer’s limp direction and out of touch
sensibility almost sink the movie, but the performances are
all solid and the movie floats along on meager charm.
Ali
Nick:-
Michael Mann's bizarrely empty, but long biopic about the
greatest professional fighter there ever was, is saved by
a few great performances and a smart attention to detail.
Will Smith is surprisingly good as Ali, and even more surprising
is the almost-always annoying Mario Van Peebles as Malcolm
X. The film covers ten crucial years in the life of Ali, but
it never really teaches us anything we didn't already know.
Supporting characters are shuffled in and out for no reason,
and there isn't really a satisfying emotion climax. But, the
film is worth seeing if only for the extraordinary performance
from Jon Voight as Howard Cosell. A true transformation goes
down every time he's on screen, and the scenes between Smith
and Voight are the highlights of the film.
Alien
vs. Predator (PG-13)
Nick: Good God.
ALL
ABOUT MY MOTHER
Nick: A wonderful, movie and charming film from acclaimed
Spanish director Pedro Almodovar. Great performances all around!
All
About The Benjamins (R)
Steve Bertrand: Ice Cube stars as a Miami bounty hunter.
Mike Epps is his frequent catch. Through a series of coincidences,
the two end up teaming to fight an international jewel theft
ring. Ice Cube is interesting, but this is a one note movie.
Epps is funny at first as the big talking little man, but
it wears thin pretty quickly.
Nick: Ice Cube and Mike Epps star in this relatively stupid
action/comedy about stolen diamonds and wacky jokes. It has
some laughs thanks to the charm of the cast, but it never
really comes to life and is filled with tired gags and recycled
plotlines. 
All
Access
Nick: A surprisingly good mish-mash of a concert film,
shot for the Big IMAX screen. The interviews are pretty good
and there seems to be a wide ranging group of genres here
to keep people happy. While I was suffering through Rob Thomas
and Kid Rock...I knew that B.B. KiIng and Dave Matthews were
only a few minutes away (But, if I hear that damn Santana
"Smooth" song one more time, I'll take hostages).
All
The Pretty Horses - (PG-13)
Nick: Billy Bob Thornton's choppy, boring and unsatisfying
film version of the national best seller. A good cast is wasted.
-
Almost
Salinas (PG)
Steve Bertrand: Almost
Salinas is a simple and sweet story, peppered with interesting
characters, set in a defining location. Unfortunately, the
story lets the rest of the film down. Max Harris (John Mahoney)
owns a diner in the crossroads California town where James
Dean was killed in a car crash. He lords over a staff that
is stuck in life. When a movie company comes to town to film
a documentary on Dean, we see as each of characters is set
off on a new course. The problem is, the story, which is allowed
to meander early in the film, is forced at the end. Too bad.
Still there are reasons to see this film. The wonderful soundtrack
(featuring a number of Chicago artists) is among them.
Nick:
A
locally produced film that starts out great, but quickly and
completely falls apart, despite the work of a very good cast.
John Mahoney, Linda Edmond, Ian Gomez (a fabulous character/comedy
actor from Chicago), Virginia Madsen and, briefly but brilliantly,
Lindsay Crouse do the best they can with the weak script and
sloppy direction of Terry Green. A missed opportunity.
Along
Came A Spider (R)
Nick: Uninspired sequel to Kiss The Girls features
a visibly bored Morgan Freeman and Monica Potter trying to
solve a mystery involving a maniac and a politician's daughter.
Full of holes and full of something else too. -
Along
Came Polly (PG-13)
Nick: Ben Stiller plays the "Ben Stiller" role yet
again in this wacky comedy about an uptight man who finds
love after his new wife cheats on him. The cast is terrific,
and there are some big laughs in the film, but ultimately
the toilet jokes and blind ferret gags take over, and the
talents of the cast seem to be wasted. Among the victims are
Alec Baldwin, Debra Messing, Hank Azaria (doing yet another
wacky accent), Phillip Seymour Hoffman (actually pretty funny
here) and the beautiful Jennifer Aniston who despite her ample
charms can't save this movie.
Amadeaus:
The Director's Cut (PG)
Nick: - This is one of my very favorite films and if you
have not had the joy of seeing it on the big screen, don't
finish reading this...leave right now and see it. Milos Forman's
masterpiece about the rivalry between a genius named Mozart
and a mediocre talent named Salieri hits all the right notes.
F. Murray Abraham won an Oscar (and has been barely seen since)
and Tom Hulse shines as Mozart. It's thrilling, funny, creepy,
suspenseful, beautifully shot and acted, and above all filled
with remarkable music. There are twenty added minutes that
flesh out a few things, and make one of the best films of
the 80s an even better, longer experience. I love this movie.
Amandla
(no rating)
Steve Bertrand: This
is a remarkable documentary about the influence of music in
the South African revolution. It's an uplifting story, told
very well by director Lee Hirsch. There are a couple of things
that stand out. The first is the influence that men and women
shared in bringing change to South Africa. It wasn't a female
cause, neither was it a male cause. They worked side by side
with great equality. The second is the masterful editing of
the music in this film. We watch as one man or woman is singing
a signficant song and are swept away as Hirsch's crew transforms
it into a stadium performance.
American
Outlaws (PG-13)
Nick: About as bad as it gets. This is a horrible film
and an insult to the great Western Genre. It ruins a classic
story and my entire review can be summed up like this: Rent
The Long Riders. -
Steve Bertrand: Jesse James and his James-Younger band
of outlaws have gone through so many Hollywood treatments
it's become difficult to separate fact from fiction. Until
now. There's no way this could be true. Colin Farrell stars
as Jesse, a righteous Confederate raider in the final days
of the Civil War. All he wants to do is settle down on his
farm and take care of Ma (Kathy Bates). That all changes when
the Yankee railroad executives decide they want to build a
railroad through Jesse's farm. According to the film, that's
what sets him off on his bank robbery spree. He doesn't want
the money, he wants to make things right. What's the difference
between Farrell's Jesse James and the Hollywood executives
responsible for him? They could care less about making things
right. They want the money.
AMERICAN PIE
Nick: A raunchy, tasteless and remarkably sweet film about
growing up. A lot of fun!!
American
Pie 2
Steve Bertrand: The boys are back and as naughty as
ever in American Pie 2. This time, they're just back from
their first year away at college. They haven't grown much,
yet. That comes later. Oz is still in love, Jimbo is still
confused, Stifler remains as determined as ever, and Finch
still has eyes for Stifler's mom. This is a raunchy comedy
that time and again goes for the easy joke...and I loved it.
Mostly because, despite its coarseness, the characters are
real and the message ends up being sweet.
Nick:
A big disappointment. Not nearly as good as the original,
in fact it's a pale imitation of the first. Many of the gags
are recycled (something in the beer is changed to champagne
that's not quite champagne; instead of pie, there's super
glue; instead of the internet there's a CB gag), to lesser
effect. Many of the terrific characters are short shifted
(the girls are barely in the film this time). The movie does
have some laughs in it, but none of them as big as the original.
The film also lacks the surprising sweetness of the original
and the depth of character. It's OK, but it's nothing like
the first one, which remains one of my favorite teen films.
-
American
Wedding (R)
Steve Bertrand: The third in the American Pie series
has arrived and, like before, the filmmakers often just enough
sweetness to overcome an abundance of gross-out humor. Jim
(Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) are getting married,
which gives Jim's dad (Eugene Levy) plenty of chances for
offering advice to each. But really this is Stiffler's (Seann
William Scott) story. That's too bad. Stiffler is fine in
small doses, but the oversexed blowhard wears a little thin
when he's the central character. Still, just when you think
you've seen enough, writer Adam Herz and director Jesse Dylan
real you back to your seat with a poignant moment.
Nick: This
should have been titled "Stifler's Maturation," almost the
entire film is about this guy. The third chapter in the American
Pie saga that began with the 1999 film (by far the best of
the series) and ends here...thank God. Much like chapter two,
this film's jokes seem recycled, uninspired, and for the most
part not very funny. Nearly all of the smart and funny female
characters have been chopped out (also Chris Klein: missing)
leaving a gapping hole in the cast. There are moments of sweetness
here and there, and the film is actually closer in tone to
the great original than the last sequel was, but it's still
a mess. I loved, loved, loved the first film and they still
haven't recaptured that magic. Admittedly, there are some
nice moments and a few amusing gags, but overall this is yet
another unnecessary sequel.
America's
Sweethearts (PG-13)
Nick: A wildly uneven romantic comedy that fails on
many levels and yet, because of its cast, it remains a pretty
entertaining movie. The film wavers between broad farce, romantic
comedy and Hollywood satire, very sloppily. The final half
hour of the film is absolutely awful, but for the most part
it generates some laughs. The performances range from realistic
(Julia Roberts) to downright absurd (Hank Azaria, sporting
a wacky Spanish accent) to somewhere in between (John Cusack
in a truly schizophrenic performance). The film is a mess,
but it's still kind of fun to watch...until that ending. -
Steve Bertrand: John Cusak and Catherine Zeta-Jones
play two movie stars who are sweethearts on and screen and
(until very recently) off. Now she can't stand him and he
can't get over her. The trouble is they have one more movie
to market so the movie executive (Stanley Tucci) corrals his
just fired publicity chief (Billy Crystal) to bring them together
for one last movie junket. Julie Roberts is the sister to
Zeta-Jones petulant diva. No one would go to see this film
if it weren't for the big names on the marquis. There are
some funny moments, and some stale ones. Mostly, it's disappointing.
When Harry Met Flubber. -
Amelie
(R)
Nick: A beautiful French fantasy/comedy from the director
of Delicatessen and The City of Lost Children. It shouldn't
work as well as it does (at any given moment this light movie
could just float away, but it doesn't) and its mixture of
styles is a bit jarring at times, but this is never less than
a mesmerizing experience. -
The
Amityville Horror (R)
Nick: Better than the original 1979 movie, but still
pretty bad, this shocker (based on a “true story”) is about
a family that moves into a house where a multiple murder/suicide
took place. Now, the place is haunted by spirits that include
a creepy little girl...just like every other horror movie
of the past three years. Ryan Reynolds is quite entertaining
as the dad who goes nuts, and the film has some great suspense
sequences and a couple of good shocks, but overall, it’s not
good.
Anacondas:
The Hunt for the Blood Orchid (PG-13)
Nick: I know this is garbage, I know it’s dumb and
I know I should turn in my film critic credentials, but I
don’t care, I had a good time. Although, admittedly, it’s
not as good as the first film.
Analyze
That - (R)
Steve Bertrand: This
is just what you would expect a sequel. A diluted version
of a good idea. Analyze This from 1999 was a clever story
of mobster (Robert DeNiro) and his analyst (Billy Crystal).
In the sequel, the two are re-united to help the mobster go
straight, maybe. There are laughs here, but they're mostly
out of nostalgia for the first time we heard the joke. Again
this time Joe Viterelli shines as sidekick Jelly.
Nick:
A
lame sequel to 1999's original hit again features Billy Crystal
as a shrink and Robert DeNiro as a mobster. The novelty has
definitely worn off, and despite a few big laughs this suffers
terribly from sequelitis. Louder, broader and a lot less interesting
than the original.
ANALYZE THIS
Nick: A hilarious
comedy featuring a great performance by Robert DeNiro. It's
filled with BIG laughs, and except for the last few minutes
(when Billy Crystal makes an ass of himself), it's a flawless
comedy. A must see.
Anchorman
(PG-13)
Nick: Will Farrell = genius. Anchorman = hilarious.
Andrew
Lloyd Webber's The Phantom of the Opera (PG-13)
Nick: Please.
Angel
Eyes (R)
Steve Bertrand: Jennifer Lopez continues her assault
on pop culture with another movie this week. She's a Chicago
c
