TIDBITS AND FIT-BYTES: Mary’s DWTS Season #23 Week 4 Analysis

Steve Cochran Show Traffic Anchor Mary Van De Velde

Steve Cochran Show Traffic Anchor Mary Van De Velde

Dancing With the Stars – Mary Van De Velde’s Take on Season #23 Week 4

It’s Cirque du Soleil week! I guess since the show often turns into a circus with Tom Bergeron the Ringmaster, we might as well try to mix in some dancing with acrobats, trapeze artists and clowns. I don’t think that would be a distraction at all! Is there an elephant in the room too?

Anyway, it turned out all the mayhem WAS a little distracting, since for some of the dances, I just wanted to watch the Cirque performers, not the dancers! The music was fantastic though, including numbers from Michael Jackson and the Beetles.

Two big surprises: If you know who they are… professional dancers Sasha and Emma got engaged! They did a sexy contemporary dance and afterward, Sasha offered a sweaty proposal and the place went crazy. She did say “yes”. Surprise #2…it’s double elimination week….yes!! Finally we’re moving things along after another three hour week show. I mean I love DWTS, but I have to catch up on Chesapeake Shores (cheesiest show ever!)

Here’s the rundown:

1) Calvin Johnson Jr. & Lindsay – awesome Charleston. Great lifts (Bruno said Lindsay was tossed like a pancake), but ugly brown weird costumes. Calvin needed 3 towels and soaked his shirt!
23 pts. – they got ripped off

2) Maureen McCormick & Artem – well-done Argentine Tango. She cries again and says “It was such an incredible moment for me” ! Ugh. At least Florence isn’t honing over her anymore.

3.) Jana Kramer & Gleb – Fox Trot to a hippy-looking “Here Comes the Sun”. Nice n’ light. Julianne says “learn how to spot”, so her head doesn’t go all over.
23 pts.

4.) Marilu Henner & Derek – Paso Doble. For a person who has that high memory gift, she seems to have problems remembering steps, but always has great dresses. I’m disappointed, she was doing so well.
21 pts.

5.) Amber Rose & Maks – steamy Argentine Tango. Julianne said last week she was uncomfortable. This week, I was blushing! I mean the garters didn’t help hold up the bootie. Sorry, but I can’t take much more of her strutting her stuff around…just dance!
24 pts. – nice person, but scores should’ve been lower

6) Ryan Lochte & Cheryl – Viennese Waltz – cool black & white costumes. His swimmer back is improving, much better posture and hold. Did I hear yelling again in the background?
22 pts.

7.) BabyFace & Allison – a very-troubled Tango . I feel so bad
for him. He looked like a deer in the headlights as he forgot most of the dance. I’m bummed….love him and his attitude
18 pts only.

8.) Terra Jole & Sasha – samba in Zebra-striped costumes. She does a great job once again. Big kudos to Sasha for keeping the choreography appropriate for her size .
25 pts.

9) Laurie Hernandez & Val – Jazz danced spot-on to Michael’s “The Way You Make Me Feel.” Just give her the mirror ball trophy now. – three 10’s, first perfect score of the competition.
30 pts.

10.) Vanilla Ice & Witney – Waltzed well despite his 5 concerts during the week! No mistakes but Julianne says he still has pancake hands (whatever that means). Hopefully he’s not toast this week, haha.
23 pts.

11.) James Hinchcliffe & Sharna – Quick-stepped his way to the top with his top hat still in place! He had great hold and looked like the master of ceremonies he portrayed (Tom was proud)
28 pts.

After a recap of every performance, more acrobatics, the engagement, an unbelievable Derek Hough solo, finding out Ryan eats pizza on Fridays, Terra has to dance with cold hands (good thing it’s not feet), Maureen reads daily from a devotional book, and Calvin is always in the jelly bean jar, the ELIMINATIONS got underway.

BABYFACE is the first to go , but still had a smile on his face.
VANILLA ICE is next to exit. I disagree with this one since he had a pretty good week and finally didn’t rap or wear the low-crotched pants.
His real name, BTW….Robert Matthew Van Winkle…good thing the iceman cometh.

Four men “star” dancers are gone…less chance of a shirtless performance, but there’s still Derek and Maks!